Job Application 2014

Assalamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

I think since now I am typing here, I had applied few jobs only for this year. The last year applications are all not counted but I am just telling you out there especially those takabbur guys who already got their position secured in companies or agencies around but bitching around like there is no God watching or listening to you that you boast on everything is due to your own hard work! I am not giving up simply to see you laughing at unfortunate ones!!! You are worse than those who killed little kids and elderly people in the battlefield! 

I used the word takabbur last time to describe 'Amr Diab (Egyptian pop singer) when I talked about Arabic entertainment with 'Emad who was my classmate. He told me the word is so appropriate, haha... Anyway, sorry friend. I do not really care about geopolitical issue in the Middle East. Our ancestral land (Yemen) too faced many problems yet nobody gives us a shit. People are killed and treated like animals around the world. It is not only the issue of Muslims but a global issue which also related to other inhabitants of the world known as, the human race!  The angels had already talked before the God about us as recorded in the Glorious Quran (Surah al-Baqarah 2:30) but many of us still forgot this.

Firstly, in the beginning of this year... I applied for a government servant position. I was not so much knowledgeable about how to apply into government agencies but one of my Yemenite acquaintance known as 'Abdullah told me to apply for government position and not to waste our position as the sons of the soil although we are not Malays but because we are here since 300 years ago. Well, many of my cousins from my father side work as police, soldiers, guard or watchmen. They are the sons of my Hassan and Hussain uncles. Some of them do business especially the ladies and they do not really care about "jurisprudence" regarding halal business. Their mother is different to my father's mother. My father's mother is a Malay woman. Their mother is North-Indian Arab just like my grandfather. Many of those acquaintance from Mokalla in Yemen also asked me to join our government service. Well, I am interested to serve our government but it is not easy to apply even when we hold the passport and citizenship. I applied a post in the Foreign Affairs Ministry. I am not sure whether I would pass because they have tests before I could go for the interview.

In this month, I applied some jobs in the United Nations Development Programs. I saw that there are lots of vacancies in the United Nations High Commission for Refugees in Kuala Lumpur but I have to stay away from the agency because I only served for less than a week. I had to quit because of responsibility to my family. I afraid that they would blacklisted my name since my name was also sent to Bangkok at the headquarters for Asia Pacific region. However, I cannot find any suitable job as according to my qualifications that made me have to fight tooth and nail to survive. I sent two applications for Policy and National Institutional Expert which is based in Quezon city, the Philippines. The other one in this agency is the Communication and Advocacy Officer based in New York. I do not know on how I would be engaged with the interviews or even reaching those places. Well, for the Philippines perhaps I can manage to reach there. 

The second one was the European Communications Associate. It is in the Open Society Foundation. The place is far too which is in the United Kingdom. I do not know how I would reach there say if it is for the interview. Maybe they have Skype interview or maybe phone interview? Do they accept non-national who live abroad applications? I do not know and I do not know. I am just dependent to Him as the Provider of the Sustenance.    

I lament my stubbornness last time when I wanted to stay true to myself that I cannot be a robot to fulfill the labor needs in the country by refusing to go for pharmacist training, refusing to study culinary art which was proposed by my mother or going for technical training. Because I am not a machine kind of person. I am more to humanity. Those people like the late Salam el-Masdusi which I posted in few posts below are humanity kind of person. I am identified as that kind of person. 

I do not think that I am going to succeed with my applications because of several factors such as the lack of experience, the due date which is so much close since there are so many online job openings and we might lose the pace when we feel tired looking at the monitor but at least I tried. 

For those who are studying, make sure you really sure on what you are doing. Do not simply do things because you see that others are doing so. Follow your own necessities. Sometimes we already planned things but obstacles come such as unfortunate incidents. It happens because this world is a test for faithful servants of the God. Some people live so smoothly that they know no hardships at all. Some who realize that the world is temporal such as lord Siddartha Gautama went out and being a "silly fool" leaving behind his luxurious palace to live like beggars bearing humiliation. I am not trying to compare myself to this great teacher or other great teachers but their life portray what most of us are experiencing around down here.... 

I think I get some idea on doing some part-time jobs. Maybe working in the cinema which is a good start for a jobless loser like me. I could get some money as tool for me to move say if I get another secured job. I get to know few Bangladeshi or perhaps Myanmar migrant workers from the musalla where we prayed together. They are so kind to me that they offered to help me to find part-time jobs as cleaner and road sweeper. I would never forget their kindness. They are at least better than my own selfish relatives or country men. They deserve to be treated like angels. I believe that they are the unknown living saints for me... May He bless them always and may they live a blessed life forever and ever :'(      

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!

Muharram Job Interviews

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

Today 23 Muharram 1345 H I just received two calls from different hotels in our area. I tried to apply for a job this morning and I have got a call for a front office job just after an hour I perform the Ḍhuha optional service, haha. I did not recite any specific prayer wishing for any job but I just ask Him to help me leading my life and help me with my mission for Him.

I sent an email to the Pullman Hotel for a front office position this morning. And the Human Resource called me and giving me an email about detail which I should fill in the four pages form. Also a copy of identity card and I have an interview at 15:00 on this Friday. I have to be there 10-15 minutes before the interview.

Then, few hours later. I received another call from Shangrila Hotel. I thought that they already had forgotten my application for steward job. The lady who called me asked whether I am familiar or whether I understand the job specification? I just explained to her that I have no experience with the job but I know that it is a job in the kitchen. My acquaintance, Mr. Azrul already had told me about the job while he is also a graduate cleaner in a hotel in Damansara. The lady then offered me a job as a receptionist and arranging an interview for me tomorrow Thursday at 15:00!!

I just planned to leave the house and buying a ticket for Kangar and later jumping to Langkawi for hotel jobs because I thought that I would have to migrate if I cannot flourish in our neighborhood here, haha. But suddenly the calls hitting my phone. My mother was actually afraid that I would leave her alone because I suddenly cleaned my room and folding all stuffs in this little room. But that is not my real intention to leave her alone. I just wanted to establish myself before I could "save" the others namely my parents. I always think about them and I love them. I do not want them to be neglected in the future especially girls at our house are not as typical as people might think. They are modern women who devote themselves for career and also their husbands' family. My parents are fortunate as compared to those who have no son at all. Imam Ja'afar al-Sadiq r.a mentioned that, "Daughters are mercy compassionate of the parents and when they are well-educated by parents thus parents will be rewarded with meritorious deeds. Sons are grace of the God the Highest. They will help the parents when they are well-educated (with religious teachings)".

I checked the range of salary for entry level for those two positions: front office assistant and receptionist. The range is from RM 1500-1650. So funny that I always have to begin from zero when I leave my previous position after I worked so hard. Last time, my salary was RM2100. But I can do nothing because I am entering another boundary which is different from the other. Well, just take the challenge and off we go followed with tawakkal (dependency only) to Him.

This is a bit on our struggle to find job and establishing ourselves dear brothers and sisters out there. I have no time to blame anyone on my misfortune. But I have to work very hard. I tell you something that we cannot think like our countries are new countries like Timor Leste anymore. Perhaps Timor Leste would also experience what we are currently experiencing when their country reaching a certain stage of development. There would be many universities and colleges and people are racing among each other to be labor or slaves to capitalists (slaves of the world).

I will share with everyone the outcome if I am free for that, inshā Allah. I have to do some researches for those sudden interviews. This is actually for those who are still looking at which direction to go with their life. I am sharing this specially with you : ) Wish I could get any one of those jobs and be strong in the future. Praise Him in all circumstances never forget Him who controls everything in the universe...

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!

Sorrow

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

I was in the musalla at Tekun hostel of Universiti Sains Malaysia in 2010 when I received a text from my mother saying that my father was attacked with strokes. At that time, he was not paralyzed like today. I am so sorry bapak... I should be by your side at that time but I was stuck there because of conscience toward whatever that I had started...

I tried to make friends with those Tabligh congregation brothers but I end up feeling stupid myself. They finished their studies without informing me that they had gone home. I did not give any agreement or commitment on the "outing" because I do not like to make promises since I afraid that I would break it. Promise and the action related to contract is a big thing for me. I would even risk my life for that if I say it out loud. I thought that they were trying to befriend me but it turns out that they had got more better things to do in their life. I was quite disappointed too at that time. I had twice experience being dumped by acquaintances whom I thought were friends. Traumatized because of this, I avoid people and stop making friends no more. Life is so much filled with selfishness and egoism. 

I even ignore the Tabligh congregation of our neighborhood who tried to persuade me to join their congregation. I am done with it I do not want to be manipulated by any "movement". I have a huge respect to the teachers who established the congregation but I do not want to have any contact with the members. I had seen something which is not so pleasant in their center which is an "abstinence" for me pantang datuk nenek... Double standard... The high ranking people there only entertain those with "money", nice looking ones, and those who study in "good" courses in which the future of the recruited member makes him useful for those who is close to him. I am not trying to say anything bad about the movement. Never. I just wanted to say that we could see human "colors" when we are among them. I would better make friend with the God the Highest. I do not care if people wanted to call me names anymore. Eventually we will have to be alone in the grave-hole so why not I proceed a little quicker before it happens? I refuse to talk with people or making friend any more. I admire the friendship of Amir Khusro with his mentor, Muhammad Nizamuddin. I do not have any fortune to have great mentors but I am grateful that the God the Highest has given me the Glorious Quran as a loyal companion and a mentor itself.

I just cried alone in musalla this morning while reciting the Yaasin for the souls of ancestors and noble prophets. I have to make sure that there was nobody there except me and Him just in case if my eyes suddenly raining tears. Or else it would be an embarrassing thing for people to see a guy crying like a little baby, haha. I do not know why men have to pretend to be strong in front of others? However, I am also accustomed to that norm. I just feel embarrassed if people look at me crying.

I just talked to Him because I do not know how to help my father. I understand that he must be very depressed being locked in that paralyzed body. He cannot do anything on his own except screaming. I feel like crying when looking at my father's face. Now, it is like 18 months he is in that condition. I tried all sort of things including reciting Quran for him but we are nobody to Him. How can we tie His "hands"? He could do anything if He wills. From these experiences, I learned that He is incomprehensible by lowly creatures like us. This is a meditation and contemplation itself. When we see something in this temporal world, we could also imagine that it is not going to last long in that condition. Only He is immutable.

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!

Starting Over

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

I had made few researches on jobless situation in our country. It is not so much a full finding but is still reliable for fellow jobless friends and also those who are still deciding to further their studies in the university or college especially when they are so excited looking at their friends preparing for their further studies in the university.

Young friends, let me give you an advice. I had already gone through whatever you are now going through. Do not be easily deceived by situations around. Make considerations and get proper guidance on your future. Do not follow your friends or anyone around you but decide yourself with the prayer to the God the Highest on what you are going to do. I am still waiting responses on the unofficial research and collecting responses. If I had almost complete it then I would publish it up here as a warning, haha. Just do not be so sad if you are not doing well in your SPM or examinations in school level or any level it is.

Do not try to take your own life because I had also experienced it few times! I almost took my life when I was 17 years old just after I took my SPM result. I thought that I wanted to be transferred into the highest world after I died. Different to my family members who were not so much spiritual in tendency... I was also a self-educated in Buddhism and I wandered to Buddhist monastery, listening to Buddha Dharma speeches and tying the white thread at my right hand at Buddhist monastery when I was a young 13 years old boy. It happened for almost four years as I could remember when I was in that stage of life. I thought that when I killed myself by performing deep meditation without any food or drinks could bring my "soul" into the angels' world. Luckily my mother broke my room's door and forced me to eat. Nobody was paying attention at me at that time and I ceased performing Islamic teachings but more influenced by Buddhist thoughts. We were in distress with family conflicts as my father and us were not favored by my mother relatives and my father was struggling with his career so I believed that nobody would realize that I am going to commit suicide. I did not know at that time, I was in between the two evils. This is related to a teaching by a Buddhist teacher. I am not going to talk long about this because this is not my purpose posting things here, haha.

I had photocopied my resume with my own salary, haha. I feel so relieved that I could still save some money though I worked for not a long period. I had to print out new resume because I have new experience added in it. This is for my next year preparation. I plan that this Monday would be the day I submit one resume to Shangrila hotel. I am still sticking to my early plan but before this I was persuaded by my eldest sister to try joining the KL Airport Services Sdn. Bhd. around May 2013. I have to quit after a week Customer Services training because of my previous security pass issue in the airport. I did not submit my pass to the "real" security office when I was 19 years old working as a Chinese Interpreter and the Immigration office had lost my pass but my record is still in security office database. I made a report at the airport police station but after that I decided to quit because there was a long-winding process to clean my record and it would also burden the company. I was not there to burden anyone but just trying to get some living! Other than that, the place is so far from my house. I have no transportation on my own and it is not easy to rent room with no one that you know. I have to stand on my own "feet" without anyone to support me either morally or in term of connections that would enable me to get other helps from friends.

In the beginning, I just wanted to apply for either a cleaner job or a steward job which is related to cleaning the dishes in the kitchen for a part time job. In the same time, I could progress for self-development and repent to the God the Highest by performing penance and memorizing Quran in the gap time. Then I plan to teach the immigrants here either Myanmarese, Indians or Bangladeshis with the Quran as a mean of knowledge sharing. I had screened some and I found there are few suitable "target" and I just need their consent to help me accepting the sharing. If they wanted it then I would transfer them through two ways training. I could say that am quite racist toward rich people, hhaha...

I do not feel like wanted to be an executive or living like a rich people and I know where is my position society. I do not study anything for myself but I studied as a mean for da'awa tools and penance so that people would not look at us da'ies as people who only talk about hereafter here and there which is unseen things! So, please those who always say bad things to us graduates of the university! Do not be so arrogant and the God the Highest is listening and watching you in every corner of the universe! He could take anything that you are enjoying right now in no time! Just be grateful to the God the Highest and have some empathy to other creatures if you cannot help others. 

My colleague, Amir had talked about quitting his job. I tried to convince him to stay but he said that he feel tortured. Then I just suggest that he would better quit if he cannot go on because what for staying in the place if he is not happy? Then, we just decided to cooperate in doing translation and interpreting job which was our undergraduate major. It is not so much fruitful but I guess that is what we have in our selves. We have no other talents to sell like voice or even look, haha. If so then perhaps I would become an actor or a singer. Interpreters and translators could also serve as da'ies and civilization bridges. 

I had successfully memorized a surah and I am so happy. Thank you dear the God the Highest. I love you so much!!!!! I wrote my experiences in Buddhism and few concepts about Buddhism especially about Theravada school of thought concepts, the Sarvastisvadin and the Brahminical thought. I wrote few in Malay while others are in English. It is not for public circulation but simply as an experience of a "Muslim guy" from an overseas Arab family disguised as Malays. I am not sure whether I should publish it but I would perhaps just keeping it in my diary.

I need to clean my room and clean the ashes on my rack, it is filled with the chandan (sandalwood) ash... It is a pigsty, goshhhh!! Anyway, brothers and sisters out there. Please do not be so much influenced by your examination in the school. Just try to live a happy life and face the fact of life. Life is not so much filled with happiness but it is a myriad of scenes. If we accept the real life then we will also be content with whatever that we receive and moving on to other phase of life. Nothing to be sad of, nothing to regret, nothing to be afraid of... 

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin! 

Knowledge

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

Praises due to the God the Highest. We managed to finish our Friday service in the mosque. The newly arrived imam at the mosque is quite helpful especially he would explain the message of the verses that he just recited in the prayer service. I did not bring my notebook to the mosque so I would have to focus more on his speeches.  This is actually the method that I would love every imam to practice and not just reciting the long-winding surah of the Glorious Quran and after that reciting the supplication in long-winding Arabic language. That is fine for the training but we could also do that while performing the Qiyam al-Lail or the Night Vigil Prayers.

Sermon

Well, today's sermon is about the importance of the knowledge. It is a broad and general topic discussed by everyone and almost everywhere. Knowledge is a useful tool for every da'ie and the preacher of Islam so that we would not be shooting like nothing. The reason why we wanted Islam to spread across the universe is not because of dominion. As what has been mentioned in the Hadith al-Qudsi, the intention is the primary source of the act. If we intend to have dominion on the world, then we would only bringing tensions and tainting the name of our noble prophet Muhammad s.a.w while we always say that we love him. Is not this contradictory to what we say at our lips? I am sure everyone knows what is meant by the hypocrites and it is also a title of a surah in the Glorious Quran itself where the God explains to us about the hypocrites. Despite of looking to others with rising perceptions... How about if we have some insights in ourselves by keeping our silence. 

Monologue

I did a lot of meditation myself besides learning again about Islam and I felt the pain when I am trying to remove evil "me" from my inner self and mind. Perception is actually a phenomenon which comes and goes. It is a temporary phenomena. This is nothing from the sources of Imam al-Ghazali or Ibn Hajar while I am also learning from both of them through teachers such as the late Mr. Sa'id Ramadan al-Bouti materials. I am being honest. Some of my insight materials are from the source of the Path of Self Purification. They are not from prophet Muhammad s.a.w. Like I told everyone through various posts before. I had trained myself through the teachings of the enlightened teachers from ancient India though I was also educated in basic Islamic system. There were five recognized aggregates forming the mental phenomena that come and go while one of them is the perception. The other four are the physical form, cognition, volitional formation or sensuality, and mental structure or mental object. Translation perhaps is not enough to explain all of these matters. One need to understand the original language of the teachers who taught all of these which is the ancient Indian language. Just like fellow brothers and sisters believe that the Glorious Quran and teachings of our noble prophet Muhammad s.a.w should also be understood in Arabic and through the exegesis. So do other teachings. When we depend too much on these matters, we would be sunken into the stream of sufferings. Suffering here refer to the state of mind and it affects the physical matters around. I am not trying to talk about these because these are not so much important.

But as to say, this is just a knowledge from various kind of sciences which could be founded in the Earth. This is a practical psychology. Not so much about metaphysical stuffs. That is why I was so furious when some kids saying that what I am talking is about the "unveiling" concept. One has to be very careful about what they are thinking and also saying as the word is the manifestation of the mind and heart. There are countless lights that veils Him and it is a blasphemy to think that we had already reached the knowledge about Him while only about 0.00000001 percent is unveiled. So, please those who is approaching the circle be very very careful I beg everyone including myself. Make sure that we are walking within the circle of Islamic Path and then practice the morality of the noble prophet Muhammad s.a.w may we be blessed with boundless happiness.

Manner of Seeking Knowledge

Before we study anything, we should start it with the intention. Our intention must be sincerely to reach the pleasure of the God the Highest. We should study anything because of we wanted to secure a job. Let me tell brothers and sisters something. I realize that why the God the Highest had turned me this far from the Sharia stream through everything that happened around me. I could see that if we study the religion only to secure a job and to live happily then it is not path of the noble prophet Muhammad s.a.w : ) 

The other is we should not study anything because of fame and that is why I hate people coming close to me in crowd. I always asked anyone who wanted to approach me or trying to practice the practices to always come to me alone. I do not mind to be a mentor and also his student. I believe in mentor-mentee system for training. That is the system where the previous teachers of the pious predecessors used to practice when they studied the traditions.  I did not intend to make anyone looking stupid. That is far from my heart because I do not like to do anything to others which I do not like to happen to me. If I intend to do so... I would have long reprimand people in front of the crowd like people of various movements doing that to me. The reason why I am secluding myself from movements today is because I do not like to see things being committed upside down by the wrong people. When it comes to Islamic teachings, we must doing it right in term of manner, time, position, knowledge and practices. 

We should seek the knowledge from the right teachers. While seeking information from the internet, one has to be careful with the sources of the information because the most doable research is always from the first source. This is based from research methodology and I am just summing it up for the sermon as an example. This is why the pious predecessors such as the Imam al-Shafi'ie and also teachers such as Imam al-Ghazali and others used to travel far while having to live in a very modest way just to seek knowledge which is now being studied by others without any trouble. If we wanted to know about particular matters then we should find the right teachers about the matter and not looking at some other people who oppose the matter because that is not according to the stream that we wanted to know. And this is why I wish that nobody using anything in this humble site as their arguments because this site is only a personal site based from one individual "perception" about life and the world. World view could vary from a location to another and from a person to another. So, be very wise in filtering information. Just treat this site as an entertainment so that brothers and sisters know that not only you in this world suffer but there are zillions of life suffering while living in this temporal world. This is just a humble sharing.

Be respectful to other opinions and agree to disagree. This is a very simple method and also a method which is practiced by Imam Ahmad where he loves to leave the argument or debates because it is a waste of time. Time management is very important for a seeker of knowledge especially Muslim students. Imam al-Shafi'ie said that I could debate in a very eloquent way with scholars but not with an ignorant. So, we could judge a person who is knowledgeable or not based from his tendency to debate or to prove this or that is right. Knowledge is not about whoever is wrong or correct. It is about the virtue and the benefit that everyone could enjoy from them. There are research method whether when someone is studying the Islamic sciences or any other sciences.

Be very patient when we learn something. Even in our life experience which we eventually learned from we should also be patient. I listened something in the Quran the New Dawn series and it explains something which is very beautiful about patience and its virtue. As an ordinary mortal human-being I am also not exceptional from distress or being affected by misfortunes but the concept of patience taught us to be like the cactus who sustain itself through the water supplies that it sought with its long root thrusting under the sand and stones. It signifies the mind which is used to generate the life of the physical. There is always wisdom behind whatever happened to us as what has been explained even by non-Muslim teachers. For example the philosophy about the fate, actions and destiny which signifies the past, the present and the future. There is a story too about patience and the wisdom behind everything through Quranic narration where prophet Moses a.s was ordered to follow the prophet Khidr a.s after he unintentionally slipped by thinking that no one is knowledgeable than him since he possess the wisdom from the God the Highest. But the God the Highest mentions that there is always people with knowledge almost everywhere so He ordered Him to get some wisdom from the other prophet (Surah al-Kahfi). This also means that we should be among the knowledgeable so we could get at least some of their knowledge and wisdom. In this case, I am perhaps not so much fortunate. I only know few of my cousins and nephew also memorize the Quran but I am not so much close to them. But, I could assure brothers and sisters I put value on the Quran memorizers. I love them all.

To study anything related to Him, we must make sure to protect our senses and through my contemplation of whatever wisdom of the East. The tools of senses are the portal of the mind. They are particularly six senses at our physical body which are the eyes, the ears, the nose, the tongue, the touching senses and the end is the cognition which is a group of mental processes. In these sense dear brothers and sisters, language and linguistic learning is very important. Azren which was my undergrad colleague is now a Malay teacher in Islamic College of Kuala Kangsar. He told me that the students there although studying in Islamic stream for their diploma but were not so much fond of Malay language as compared to Arabic. Maybe because Malay is not so much important as the previous times but it is still important for them because who are their target audience if they are going to perform the da'awa? Whatever language that you speak dear brothers and sisters, please take a good care of it and improve it. I am writing here in English because this is the only way I could reach other brothers and sisters outside there. I was not so much skillful in English and still improving it too. The way I studied English was that I memorized the English-Malay-English dictionary besides checking the etymology of words through R.O Winstedt English-Malay Dictionary (1913) something. That is why some people would claim that my Malay language is somehow classical as compared to modern Malay. I love Malay language so much and I could get better score for Malay language as compared to other subjects when I was in school. I only became not creative when I grow up perhaps because I learned to accept facts of life that life is not always about imagination. Imagination perhaps important but it is only an escapism. How are we going to go through the fact of life is important and the knowledge on what is the fact of life could also lead us to other branches of knowledge.

In the end, a knowledge without practice could never help us from torments of the hereafter. We have to practice and sharing them with others. Because I cannot find a suitable mentor nor mentee to study together or for sharing as I am already growing old... Three years to 30 years old so I guess this is among the ways to share some of the experience. There is of no use to collect thousand of books but we just keep them in shelves without sharing them while the contents of the books could help to bring the civilization to virtue and to Him. The things that we memorize for example the Quran is to be practice. Not for the job as a community imam or to be a religious officer. The sin for those who memorize the Quran but acting not in accordance to proper standard is gravest than the sin of the ignorant who knows nothing about the revelation. But there is always an urge for us to improve ourselves through seeking the knowledge and not to remain ignorant! 

Closing

Last week I was quite occupied because I helped Azren with his mid-term Malay paper. Thankful to him so I could earn some sustenance without having to beg like a beggar which I would better die if I commit that. He offered me to fill in another contract position as a Malay language teacher there by asking his dean but I guess I would not going to apply for that. I have had it enough.  I would just work part time here and study the Quran and other Islamic sciences here. It is ok I cannot enjoy my life like other young people with friends around. 

In fact I do not even care, hahaha. I would do it the other way which is to seek the God the Highest pleasure. The fact of life that I was talking about is the impermanence of existence, the absence of abiding self and the suffering. What matters is to improve ourselves and by time we wish that we could see Him in the hereafter. Wishing anyone who stumbled here maybe by accident enjoy them. I am not trying to post anything here for open publication. Simply my inner selves being poured down here. Outside, I am totally without voice but simply performing.

Allahumma salli 'alaa Muhammad wa 'ala aali Muhammad. Dear the God the Highest may You be pleased with all the teachers and bless prophet Muhammad s.a.w together with his family members may we also receive some essence of love from You.

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!    

Determined

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

I was actually thinking of starting again. But I would only apply for a temporary job as a steward or perhaps as cleaner in a hotel in Putrajaya. So I do not have to go out from this area for a moment and could also check on my father. Ok, I am telling my exact location. I live in Putrajaya Federal state and my parents bought a house here because of few reasons. First, my mother was tired of moving in and out. Second, my sisters do not want to return to our state in Kedah. They work here. I agreed to follow my father returning home last time but we have to be in accordance with the majority. So, here we are. 

In the same time where my maternal grandfather passed away at our house around 2007, my father was attacked with hypertension and there is a blood clot in his head. We did not notice it until May 2012 where he was hospitalized after a low-risk falling at our cousin's house in Selayang. He worked with the former Minister of Natural Resources, Dato' Azmi Khalid as his press secretary. My father had served two federal ministers and Kedah state chief minister as their press secretary. The period he served those politicians was around 1998 up to 2007. The other two ministers and politicians were Dato' Osman Aroff and Dato' Abdul Hamid Zainal 'Abiddin. The previous was the Chief Minister of Kedah state and the latter was Religious Affair Minister in the Prime Minister's Department office. To tell brothers and sisters the truth. We did not live luxurious life nor taking advantage from the position that we have like other people. Our life were miserable ones and we have to survive just like other migrants but only with the status son of the soil as our ancestors were interwoven into Malayan state system since before British arrival. I never tell anyone about my father job except that I told them my father was a reporter. That was his previous job. Some editors in the Berita Harian of the News Straits Times Press (NSTP) are his colleagues and he was their senior. I did not really like my father job as a press secretary for politicians. The job is stressful and I could see that from his face. I understood that he only went there for career advancement but no one told him about how to let go if we are going to sink down the stream.     

The secretary of ministers are of contract basis. They are not permanent government staffs. They can apply for government quarters but they have no government pension nor other benefits like covered hospital admission and stuffs. My father bought the house in the state after the agreement with my mother and they sold a property in Hulu Langat in Selangor state. My secondary schooling time partly was in Selangor state. I was always alone never close to my sisters. I did not make any long term friendship with people around because I am afraid that I would have to shift place again. The only long term friend which still survive in my contact are Amir and Azren which were my colleagues in the Universiti Sains Malaysia. The other is Aliff from the school of humanity majoring in Geography studies. I visited him after his father passed away and handing my personal donations just to ease his family sadness. I wanted to visit him frequently but right now I have to survive too. Once I could grip my survival, then I would perhaps pay him and his mother a visit. But they are just my contacts. Never my close friends. That is why I keep repeating my closest friend is the God the Highest and noble prophets of the God. They are my friends and I talk with them through prayers and salawat and salaam.

Urmm, these three weeks I am in abstinence and penitence period. I fast for Monday and Thursday again. I ignored doctor's advice on me about nutritional balance. I eat only twice a day just to survive. One is during the predawn breakfast and one is during the iftaar breaking of the fast during the dusk hour. I am performing these simply for the God the Highest. It is counted as a sacrifice on my behalf and I wish the meritorious deeds being imparted to my ancestors too. It also includes my parents. 

I refuse to speak with people around but only using signals just like prophet Zachariah a.s and the blessed lady Maryam the mother of Jesus the Christ (Surah Maryam v. 10 & 29). I just keep my silence when some brothers in musalla or masjid talked to me but giving the signals by closing my eyes that I wanted to stay in litanies after answering their greeting which is the salaam. I do not care if they wanted to say to me things like, "budak ini tak reti berdunia kah?", "banyak sombong ini orang!" or saying, "hablumminannaas hablumminallah...". I do not care... I am still in communion with communal services but I am just secluding myself from the crowd. I feel exhausted and I do not know what can I say in the conversation anymore. As I said earlier. This period seems like resembling the period of  prophet Jesus a.s where the generation with venomous tongue is rampant. People seems like religious talking religion here and there or justifying their vices or ego through religious sounding statements but in the same time they are also hypocrites having no fear to the God when uttering slanders or hurting the "heart" of other souls created by the God the Highest. I even doubt myself and I am afraid of myself too.

I am thinking of saving some money to get myself a motorbike driving license. I have car driving license but I have had no time to finish the motorcycle's. Once I have got the license perhaps I would get a motorbike to find other secured jobs. This happens because my mother was so afraid that I would join those rempit racers and afraid that I would end up die on the road. Anyway, the God the Highest can take our soul anywhere and at anytime. I think they were too paranoid. It is now making my life difficult too. I would never borrow anyone possession and it also includes motorbikes or car. Who is going to be responsible if I scratch their car or involved in road accidents with their possession??  

In the meantime, I would have to plan everything such as my worship time and Quran memorization. It is more to make them into a habit but I also have to catch up with the syllabus while not studying like normal students in Mecca or Medina. They would use their certificate to be religious officers such as tithe collectors, paid preachers, imams, teachers, and others. But I simply study these because of my responsibility to know Him. I am not sure whether I am eligible for the tithe or zakaat because al-Umm in the Kitab al-Zakah mentions that the Hashemites can get help through khums which is the 2.5 tax taken from the other Hashemites. But the problem is most of my father closest relatives are also poor. So, I end up studying them on my own without any institutional help. Only based from my previous existing knowledge from teachers and memorizing them including checking everything in detail by asking here and there. And then implementing them as a habit.

I also fast yesterday in the 9th day of Dhulhijja 1434. For brothers and sisters who fast yesterday. Congratulations...! May you receive His pleasure and boundless love. Those in the holy land are not encouraged to fast because they should have more energy to perform other acts of worship. I avoid from beef and now it is also extended to chicken. I do not know... They smell weird or maybe it is just my own poseur sense, hahaha. I just eat plain rice with salt or soy sauce in a minimized amount. It is safer and I am also avoiding from taking others rights at home. I am not working right now. It would be disrespectful to eat stuffs from women's salary. It would make me a coward and against our dignity. Dignity is above money and cannot be sold with gold. I would rather die and being killed than losing my dignity. It is about faith and valor.

Through His will I would be a cleaner or a steward washing dishes in the hotel. As long as it is legal and as long as I am not stealing whatever is not given to me. It is a quest for His pleasure. While having no possession to sacrifice, I can only offer my body as the sacrifice to the Highest. And wishing that sincerity for His pleasure and love ingrained in the heart, reaches Him.

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!        

Being Vegetarian

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

I was actually a full vegetarian and most of the time I took fresh leaves. Does not matter in the form of leaves or other part of edible plants. While at home I have to eat whatever that we have in our fridge which also includes the meat. Many people suspecting with few assumptions such as I am trying to imitate the Hindus or still is influenced by the tradition of the Enlightened people from ancient India. I just keep my silence and I refuse to say anything. Maybe yes. Maybe not. We live in the same Earth and it is not like Muslims or Arabs live in Jupiter before reaching the Earth. Or we are from different planet. Arabian culture is also divided into the legal and illegal ones when we look at them according to Islamic religious view.   

Let me tell people something. I am a Muslim. A follower of the religion of prophet Muhammad s.a.w and a follower of the path of noble prophet Abraham a.s. I follow a particular school of Islamic jurisprudence and I learned about other's as well. I am grateful to the Lord of the universe for reminding my soul to walk within the path and the lineages of His chosen prophets and messengers. Islam is a mercy of the Highest Lord to the universe and it is not something which is known as a pride as most fellow brothers and sisters might be thinking. Yes, it is part of our self identity but it is not a pride. We should be grateful to Him for Islam to flow within our body parts.

I always live in stressful condition and as long as I hold my breath, I will be tested with various of tests by the Lord as to see whether my faith and love to Him is increasing or decreasing. My family is not like other family with the children being nurtured with love. We were economic migrants from other state to another state even in the same country. Other than that, we are from mixed ancestry of Southern Arabian and Northern Indian from our paternal grandmothers' ancestor. The life story for both of my parents were not so remarkable full with sadness. I saw whatever happened to them and partly I experienced it myself. The gender balance in our family is not equal too with males as minority while the majority are females. The reason why I constantly avoiding meat is that to control my nerves and to stay healthy. My father was a meat-lover. He loves mutton, beef and fish. He also took shrimps, cockles and other seashells which is a great no for me! He was a fierce man before and now he is bed-ridden. He practiced a dark lifestyle after the active ones and he had no one to guide him. Of course I regret for not helping him but what can I do as a hapless son myself? 

Imam al-Shafi'ie rahimahullah mentions in his message to people that one could avoid the meat if he cannot leaves behind his desire or temper. I leave meat to make sure that I am in a tranquil position while I am in distress. Other than that, it is an orthodox and ancient Indian science based from empirical view or philosophy about quality of matters in nature such as pure, active and dark. It is applicable to Muslim way of life. For example, beef is considered as dark quality matter. It is dark because it will turn out to be carcass in one's intestine before being processed. The smell and the taste of carcass is evil than the smell of plants. Other than that, I know that some cattle or buffalo from India are beaten before being slaughtered. An obedient Muslim will check everything thoroughly though it appears that he is not religious in front of the public. It is illegal to eat the animal legalized in the Quran which is tortured before being slaughtered! Even the milk of those animals are illegal to be taken once they are tortured or the right of the calf to get the mother's milk is denied. The same thing applies to chicken and other poultry. This is what I understood as the Path of Islam. The science which I use to identify matters of course is not Islamic. It is philosophical. But I am not a total blind and I studied Sharia myself at the school.  

Being vegetarian is about choice. One could choose to be a vegetarian or not. Or it depends on the situation and we would see the goal of the way of life. This is what I understood from the deen. Perhaps one would say that why do you avoid meat when plants also have the soul? Well, I would say it is my choice and it is for health concern. I am not doing that only for the soul of cattle, duck, chicken or buffalo. I can also take lentils or collecting leaves which falls down from trees without being plucked if people say that cutting the plant is also cruel. It is not about being cruel or not. It is about being pure from the doubtful meat. It is about keeping physical and spiritual health.  

Other than that, I found people who take meat regularly such as those Arabs from Middle East or Indians as easily getting angry or provoked. No offense though. I also see this at home.  

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!

Working as a PR Trainee

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

Fuhhhh.... These two weeks are quite hectic. On 3rd of June 2013, I received a phone call from a government agency and the caller said that she has a temporary job to offer to me. Actually I did not haunt the job so much since I am gradually trying to leave the "world" behind beginning with balding my head. I am grateful to get the job though it is just a temporary one. I am placed in the Corporate Communication Unit which is a small unit at the basement of the department. I reported myself at the human resource office at the third floor at the block 08 on 6th of June 2013. 

I sent my thesis on 3rd June 2013 and I went to my mother's cousin sister house. I spent some time with my cousin brother, well not so little but younger than me known as 'Ady. He took me to Mee Udang restaurant owned by his friend in Balik Pulau but he does not know that I am not taking seafood. Since I did not want to make any fuss and he was so happy to introduce his state's delicacy to me so I am just celebrating him and broken the "pantang" while crying in my heart. I am happy to know that he is going to be hired for other job which is more rewarding to him. He loves sailing and I think his father is a native of Pulau Pinang which means that they are the Orang Laut. It is normal for us Arab descent to have relatives of different races... 

Right now I am a trainee of public relations in the department. We deal with publicity, ICT products of the department such as checking the pictures of the CS to the Government and the people there or the media profiles, exhibitions at the department's lobby, handling visit from other government agencies, managing media and controlling photographers in the office's official ceremonies like the Stunning Achievement Award for public servants, clerical jobs, handling complaints, and many other things related or non-related to the job specification. More or less this temporary job is related to both degrees that I have studied. About the payment, they paid me under the O-Level scheme which is RM54 (16.86 USD) per day and it is about RM1620 (505.70 USD) per month. Just be grateful with whatever that He gave us. Maybe there are hidden wisdom that we do not know.

These two weeks were the busiest weeks for me. One of the senior trainee there is going to quit from the unit since he received an offer for permanent job in other department. So, the deputy head of the unit has appointed me to take hold the jobs left by that guy. He is going to end his service in the unit this Friday so I have to learn and also finishing the left-over jobs by previous trainees since they had also involved me in their meetings. On 20th June 2013, I joined the group of trainees to entertain a visit from Bakri Police-Technical Institute. They came all the way from Johore to see the Prime Minister's Office and made a proper application to the Communication and Corporate Unit so everyone should also address their application with manner. 

Tomorrow, I am going to be a media controller in the ceremony of "Anugerah Pencapaian Cemerlang" which will be held in the Putrajaya International Convention Center. Those people ordered me to do so and I am a trainee though I have a master degree. I am going to humble down myself and try to gain experience as much as I can. So tired since today I have been working in the office for half of the day trying to finish the initial tasks received and at 15:00 we have to go to the ceremony site to check whether everything is in order. I just arrived at home at 19:04 and was sent by a younger trainee known as Naqiyuddin. He has a nice name but I am not going to entertain little kid like I used to in the Tekun hostel. I am not trying to be cocky but I am too "Old" or perhaps "Ancient" to mingle with them. Maybe some people would see me like a "sufi" person but let me tell everyone something. We do not mingle so much with people and most of all people would "cast" their sins on us. I am not something which purify people's sin nor grieves! I used to tell this to little kids in the USM hostel in a framed phrase that "I am a human-being" when they uttered some weird words but little kids are little kids... 

I have to finish up with the task. So, I beg on my knees to brothers and sisters please help me to pray to Him may He makes everything easy for me. May He makes me easy to perform every worship and always remember Him as what I had promised in the covenant with Him. Brothers and sisters please take care of your health in this hazy condition. Pray that may He orders the smoke and fire to cease away so others could be healthy and performing worship to Him in their ways.

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!              

Sunan for Friday

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

  

Just a sharing about my personal practices during Friday in conjunction to Friday. My understanding about sunan or the sunna, it actually refers to our traditions which are inherited from prophets and the messengers of the God the Highest. Besides the sunan, there are also adabs or manners in practicing the sunan as per the positive ones since the sunan could also refer to the negative ones. I don't know what my ex-roommates during my undergraduate time think about me when I practiced those things. Maybe in terms of angle of views, they seem different from the majority Muslim Malay practices. I am glad Habib Muhammad al-Sagof is helping me to explain the things as he is also one of our people, haha...

Practices during Thursday

Usually the evening before the proper Friday, which is on Thursday, I would begin to clean up the room and lit up fragrances such as sandalwood and frankincense. Then we have recitation of Quran after the Maghrib prayer service as the beginning of the new day is counted at the evening of the previous day or at 'Asr time.

Usually people in my country would recite the surat Yaasin and most who recite the Yaasin in group are the Muslim Malays who follows the Shafi'ie school. I still remember that I also used to do the same where I recited the Yaasin at home with my mother and sisters before 2000 as I began to have problems which made me deciding not to practice any Islamic practices but just performing "philosophical" meditation to clear myself from any influences. That was before I begin to learn Hanbali school when I went for pilgrimage in the Holy Mecca. The practice of hadith recitation was originated from the hadith which means: "Whoever recites the Yaasin on the eve of Friday, he will be forgiven by the morning". The status of the hadith according Ibn Jawzi is fabricated as the source chain of the hadith known as Muhammad bin Zakariya was notorious as a hadith fabricator.

By the way, Ibn Jawzi is a Hanbali scholar just to let brothers and sisters know. So, there shouldn't be any accusation or assumption being related to radical movements. I am not saying reciting Yaasin or any other surat from the glorious Quran as innovation. It is a good habit to recite Quran but there is no clear chain for the hadiths on the "benefits" of reciting surat Yaasin at "certain" time. Sometimes I would also join the group recitation at the mosque in my country to respect others and in my view, it is a good practice. I don't like to be tied to any movement or particular cult just to look different or superior than others. Besides, I hate over-reaction and I love being moderate and modest. It is enough to be a Muslim and the follower of Muhammad s.a.w while for the suggestions of sunna angle in worship, I would be referring to a particular school of jurisprudence. It does not make me eligible to harshly criticize other people practices especially when they are good ones or showing off as if my school of jurisprudence or the scholars of the school I am referring are superior above all other salaf and tabi'in scholars.       

Regarding the fragrant smokes, I tell brothers and sisters that if you live in Arabian Peninsula or in Gulf states, those people are also doing the same for certain event, majlis or festival. I am using the sandalwood in the form of sticks because it is difficult to find the pieces of sandalwood chunks here. It is very expensive and could only be founded in Arab fragrant stores. Maybe people think that I am a Muslim Indian or a Barelwi movement follower or even a Shi'a. I am not an Indian, not a second rated Indian, not a Shi'a Muslim not a Muslim Malay nor a particular sufi views adherent. I am an Arab Diaspora by descent, I love all of bani Hashim members of clan and fiercely an Orthodox Muslim. Day by day, I am trying to return to our heritage in order to protect our identity because we are largely "damaged" by the environment.

Practices during Friday          

1. Before Friday Prayer

Common practices during Friday morning before the prayer service, clipping the nails. Then, anointing myself and head with the olive oil or any oil that could be applied at the skin. Sometimes I would do it before the ghusl or sometimes after the ghusl. After the ghusl, I would apply the perfume all over my body. It is the symbolic that I am going to see the God the Highest and leaving behind the worldly affairs. If brothers and sisters see a Muslim corpse being embalmed, the practice is more or less the same.

Before I walk out, I would also lit up sandalwood or frankincense. However, myrrh and frankincense would be dangerous especially no one was checking on it at the room. Usually I do not like to walk in the crowd to the mosque. I prefer to walk rather than driving or using any vehicle. Especially when going to worship event at the mosque, it is favorable for me to walk and get prepared as early as I can in order to arrive at the mosque before the time. I practiced these as our customs since I was a young child but during the period of 1998-2004 I began to have some confusions regarding myself and some problems with life that made me starting to leave behind the salat services and all of these traditions.

2. At the Mosque     

At the mosque, I would stand at the front line if I am early to perform the two units prayer service to respect the Lord of the mosque before sitting down. Then maybe I would recite the Quran while waiting for the Friday sermon to begin. I don't like to chat nor listening to people talking about worldly affairs in the prayer hall as it is not favorable according to the manner. We can talk about worldly affairs or politics for us to survive, but outside of the prayer hall... Get the hell out of the prayer hall and talk or argue. We do not perform the optional prayer service before the first sermon. We usually would perform it at home, but that is in the case where our houses are closer to the mosque. 

When the sermon begins, we would sit still and try to attentively listen to sermon. We should try to avoid from sleeping or losing focus. Even if the sermon is so boring, try to keep some beneficial points in our mind. Last time, I used to keep the words from the sermon in my notebook once I arrived at my room just to practice whatever is beneficial for me and around. I have a special notebook specifically for Quran, Sunna and Arabic. Anything that I heard, I would keep the words in the form of writings including the source and the preachers' detail if available. Usually I can't wait to return home after the prayer service finish because I wanted to keep the words from the sermon in my notebooks, hehe...

When the imam recites the supplications between two sermons, I usually would just zip my mouth and mentally say my supplications. Sometimes by holding my hands like others, sometimes without holding hands. It is also good to recite an abundant of salawat upon noble prophet Muhammad s.a.w, his family members and righteous companions. Or maybe just reciting the salawat Ibrahimi which also includes prophet Ibrahim a.s and his family members together with prophet Muhammad s.a.w.

3. After Friday Service

Just after the Friday prayer service, it would be followed with two units of optional prayer. Sometimes it would be up to 10 units just like the Hanafi school followers. In the evening, just after the 'Asr prayer service I would recite supplications and there are many kinds of supplications ones could recite. Sometimes I would recite supplications before the Maghrib prayer service and followed by the litanies and other supplications after the service which would take me around 10 minutes up to 15 minutes. The day is now, Saturday... Then after Isha' service, if there was roommate in my room which would make me feel uncomfortable to do some night activities or which I think would disturb him.... I would just stay night at the musalla or any mosque that I could reach just after I had my dinner or supper. I would also bring my kitabs and memorize stuffs that I had already learned and understood. They are just simple and compact stuffs as I tried to make everything easy to be practiced. Not only to be memorized or to preach around like an ustad. I would also recite the Quran or memorize the parts of the Quran.

Basic    

These are basic matters that I practiced during Friday or when celebrating Friday as a holy day. There are also personal supplications but I am not mentioning everything in detail together with the hadiths or stuffs as I am trying not to be too technical just to boast around.

Regarding the sunans, there are also adabs or manners when we talk about them to people. We don't simply jump into crowd and acting furious because it would make people upset. They also possess feelings and human-being just like us. Before we jump down to them, perhaps they are with faith. But after we jump in and harshly condemning them simply because we know more about hadith studies than them or because we want to show that scholars of our school had conducted researches, they begin to stay away from Allah 'Azza wa Jalla. So, what is the point? 

There is a thin line between innovations and improvisations. Improvisation means that we improvise with whatever "we already have" to suit the situation or condition. While innovation means we "introduce something new" in an established form of structure or organization where they were not taught before by early figures. Everything that we said to others would then goes back to the "intention" and our "heart". What is the condition of our heart at that time?

Allahumma salli 'alaa Muhammad wa 'alaa aali Muhammad... May Allah Ta'ala change evil feelings within our soul into the good ones. May Allah Ta'ala makes us humble and lowly in our own eyes but in His sight, we are His beloved servants. May Allah Ta'ala gives us consistency in worshiping Him and grants us the sakina (tranquility) so we may always be on His path...  

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!  

The Concept of Mind

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

Introduction

This concept is actually familiar to me since I was a little child. I was exposed to both Islamic and Hindu-Buddhist way of thinking. It is not only about the thinking but also cultural traits and practices. Basically, I am not the kind of young people who only live a life for the sake of living. Both of the religions are of my experience as a confused boy who has nobody to be his companions, lack of love either of family or friends and most of the times secluding his self from crowds pondering about what happens around. I am so sorry if I do not do a writing like a so-called "salaf" Muslim but I could assure everyone that my religious practices are strictly orthodox and I never talk like this in front of people because I only talk according to people's level of thought. I respect the salaf al-saleh teachers and I also respect the tabi'in generations. I keep all of their books and remarks besides trying to practice them too.   

Most Muslim who discussed about philosophies always talk about Greco-Roman philosophies as what I heard in the discussion broadcasted in Malaysian Islamic Understanding Institute (IKIM) radio with someone who was involved with the International Institute of Islamic Thought and Civilization (ISTAC). I would like brothers and sisters to know, there were Buddhist Greeks as well as Eastern Asian Buddhists due to the existence of Indo-Greek kingdom of Bactria since before the Christ era. They propagated Buddhism teachings and philosophies as far as Alexandria or Iskandariyya in Egypt. I am not talking about Islam or Muslim yet till now.

Buddhism always talk about human personal experience which is framed in the pancha skandhas or five aggregates term. Then there are three marks of existence known as dukkho (unsatisfactoriness), anittiya (impermanence) and anattman (non-self). The chattwari ariya sattiyani or the four noble truth which discussed about what is meant by dukkho? Where does dukkho come from? There is a way that dukkho could be banished through the knowledge about the theory of pratitschasamudpad or dependent arising. They could be found in the atthangiko ariya margg or the eight noble path proposed by Siddhartha Gautama which are subbed into three categories which are the panna (wisdom), sila (ethics and morality) and smathi (concentration). In order to banish negative effects around the environment, Buddhism basically emphasizes mind training to perform our life where it is like we change polluted water with the clean and clear one through flushing it or flowing it with the clean one. The concept of self is connected to the mind and acts.

The positive or negative effects toward the environment which is known as the space partly comes from the mind activities of beings or creatures. Many people says that Buddhist do not believe in the metaphysical matters. It is a wrong assumption. Buddhists have three pitakas or baskets of teaching. The first one deals with the actions, meditation, breath handling and mindfulness of body. The second one, talks about disciplines. While the third and the last one deals with metaphysics and philosophies. The third basket was also taught to "angels" by Siddartha Gautama when he reached the enlightenment. The enlightened Gautama never talks about the Supreme Power as it was important for him at his time to correct the moral and attitude of the people around him. People already know about the Highest Self yet they behave like people who knows Him not. Those are just the basis.

There are many things to be learned before commenting and only if we are Buddhists ourselves. But I always encounter some fellow Muslims who talk like they know everything about other religions and views, but in reality they just check the facts at the surface. They never experience anything as per being an "infidel" or being rejected by their own community thus having to find their own way to return through His Mercy, hehe.

Islamic Concept of Mind

Now when we talk about the mind in Islam, human is deemed to be higher and special as compared to other creatures. What makes human special? They have choices in their life and it comes from their mind and thoughts. With mind, man could find knowledge and it leads human toward the better. It helps man to distinguish between evil and goodness. Deviation and annihilation is due to that man-kind did not using their faculties of mind for good purposes. So, a positive mind which is used for positive concerns would escalate a human to a noble position. But when the mind is wrongfully used for vices and evil, man-kind would fall into disdain and destructed. 

Our noble Quran mentions so many times about mind. It mentions that with mind, human could think about the creations of the God, learn about them, finding knowledge and strengthen the faith to Him. Through the guidance of the noble scripture, human who thinks could sort out the sciences in the creations of the God throughout the space. 

The God the Highest mentions through the tongue of our noble prophet Muhammad s.a.w which means: "And from the dates and grapes, you made them sweetened drinks and legal sustenance. Indeed, in those are the signs for the people who possess mind". - Surat al-Nahl 16: 67

When man-kind using his mind toward evil and vices, he would fall into the destruction and tormented with bitterness from the God. The God mentions through our noble prophet Muhammad s.a.w which means: "And when you call them toward the prayers, but they mock it and teasing it. It is due to that, they are the people with no mind". - Surat al-Maa'ida 5:58

Through faculties of mind, man-kind could search for the guidance and "truth". Thus, choosing the better one while leaving behind evil matters. Although man-kind posses mind and intelligence besides using them for daily affairs yet the result of their thoughts do not always in accordance to the real objective or achieving the aimed goal. 

Only prophets and His messengers are protected in their speeches and thoughts. They are protected from errors and deviation of the truth whether in the earthly life or in the matter of hereafter. For example, prophet Muhammad s.a.w was actually threatened by the God that His angel would strangle him if he distort the message that the God ordered him to articulate and not even to think about it. So he talks only according to the revelation of the God. Normal man-kind would commit errors in their thinking, speeches, in their decision or in the execution of their acts. That is due to the weakness of their mind and the lack of knowledge.     

The God says which means: "... and you are not given the knowledge except a little of it". - Surat al-Israa' 17:85  

For example, if a man looks at the thick black cloud up the sky, he would be thinking or expecting that the rain would soon be pouring down. But that is just an assumption of his mind based on his analysis to the factor of the black cloud. It is just a hypothesis. Sometimes the result would be true and sometimes it would be wrong. It is due to that sometimes, there are black clouds in the sky but rain are not falling down to the earth.

Islam prohibits man-kind to think with the mind which is not followed by the the Creed and the Guidance. It also prohibits the thought according to one's desire. Example for the people who think in the manner that is prohibited by the "Divine Way" are the Sophists. They evaluate good and evil based only on the senses and mind. They only used rhetoric and philosophy to explain or framing the affairs and matters around them. "Ordinary" human senses and mind are limited and bound to weaknesses. Their senses and mind could not reach metaphysics and supernatural realm.         

The difference and the higher position of man-kind as compared to other creatures in the Earth for example, the genies or the animals is their faculties of mind granted by the God to them. They could think and ponder deeper than other beings. In Buddhism, the highest incarnation of beings to achieve "final blast" into the "new world" is also in the form of a human. Not in the form of angel nor any other form. 

Humans were trusted by the God to be the administrators in the earthly realm, to prosper the Earth and holding the responsibility to keep His commandments but to avoid His prohibitions. Says the God which means: "And when your Lord said to the angels, indeed I made in the Earth the successors. The angels said: 'Are You creating in the Earth those who would commit destruction in it and those who would spill the blood while we are glorifying You with the praises for You and sanctifying You. The God says, I know the things that you do not know!" - Surat al-Baqarat 2:30 

My Further Comments

Well, if it is related to philosophies or other regional cultural traits. I am not really good in Greeks' sciences. I live in South East Asia though my ancestors were the Arabs and they were also stationed in Indian sub-continent. When I was schooled in the madrasa, it was at the border states of Malaysia and Thailand. And I was and still is an adventurous soul. I love to travel around and listening to religious teachings. 

Because I had no close friends nor companions as I am a very choosy person in making friends... I went to Buddhist monasteries and making friends there. I also make friends with the environment around which also include other creatures that some people would call them as the ghosts, hehe. I learned Sanskrit and Pali from around besides Arabic at our school because the school is a religious school. 

Language is actually the most basic tool for sciences and technology. This is what those who always talk about branches of sciences do not understand. They just understood that mathematics and those sciences such as the basic biology, astrology, chemistry or physics as at the core matters which makes me laughing my a*ss when I began to realize about the facts of life, LOL...  Anyway those sciences are categorized by Imam al-Ghazali rahimahullah as pseudo-sciences. He also learned philosophies and the rhetoric where he encountered Ismaili Shia Muslims in Central Asia who were also of Mu'tazila schools of theology.

The words such as caliph and others could be founded in cognitive with other ancient languages such as Sanskrit. For example, I would translate caliph as chakravarttin in Sanskrit where it means the ideal universal ruler. Other than that, I found that most Malay writers or translators of the logic text books for Usooluddin students always placing the Arabic terms on the place where it is not necessary. People in South East Asia also talk about Roman or Greek but Sanskrit or Pali also houses a large corpus of sciences like those of Greek.

The Eastern philosophies and sciences also deal with human mental states, environment and psychology which the Western were lacking. While South East Asian languages for example Malay or Cambodian also absorbed large amounts of Sanskrit terminologies. Is this about class because Sanskrit is not the language of the European Union or because the so-called brainy Jew, Einstein lives in Germany? Or because most of "Muslim scholars" in  the Middle East or Central Asia during the Middle Ages era reading Greek of Latin books so we have to just copy-paste their ideas to be like them?

Why can't we be ourselves? Are we lack of confidence in our selves that determines us to copy-paste other and thinking that we are intelligent with good head? Just a food of thought anyway, hahaha....

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!         

An Eid Talk with a Hostel Mate, Brother and Friend : )

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

I will always be proud with this friend and will mention his name without any alteration. His name is Alef bin Ahmad. I do not know whether he would reach here but I want you to know Alef. You are my brother in this world and hereafter. I believe that if people love you, it is surely because Allah 'Azza wa Jalla loves you. If people hate me, it is because Allah 'Azza wa Jalla hates me and I deserves it for what evil that I had committed. This friend of mine was not so fortunate because his father passed away due to sudden "heart-attack" while working at their village and he was still in the first year studying in the university. He is from Yan. He is still living with his mother and siblings back there in Yan.  

Yan is a district within our state but by our state standard, it was actually a region with few feudal lords just like other places in our state. Most of feudal lords and chieftains were actually of Arab descent but there were also native feudal lords from the native court. By today we have 12 districts but before 18th century we had few other districts or regions which is now in the lower of Myanmar, separated as a different state with its independent king and in Southern Thailand. One of our district in Southern Thailand is known as Satun which was separated into Thai administration under the governance of a royal member known as Ku Din bin Ku Meh while another which was made a state by its own right is Perlis. The king of Perlis now is of Arab descent of Jamalullayl Sayyid clan who happened to intermarry with Kedah female royal members.       

Alef was one of my hostel mate but not my course mate. We were quite close back then when I was in Aman hostel in the Universiti Sains Malaysia (USM). The hostel has so many memories for me before I went further my postgraduate studies. I have no picture with him nor any other friends at that time so people might think I am a lone-ranger at all the time. Alef is among my friend and he is my compatriot Kedah national. Our religion and faith which is Islam and the state, Kedah Darul Aman where we share the same regional language and cultural traits bonded us together as very close brothers though our state is very diverse in term of ethnicity and cultural traits by its regions. I used to watch TV with him other than with Amir. During Ramadan, we would talked about various issues whether it is about religion, daily life and politics. We became even more closer after I visited him but I just tried to avoid talking anything about whatever I did because I don't want him to feel grateful to me. I did that as a responsibility to comfort him and his family. I do not want any return and anything that I donated is not of myself but from Allah 'Azza wa Jalla. It was his property once he received it and it's not so much because I just donated what I can. If I have that much then that much is donated for unfortunate brothers and sisters. That's all.  

I used to visit him and his family just after his father passed away. I did not have any vehicle back then and I saw that those Kelantanese hostel mates had left for Alef's father burial. Other compatriots had left me alone with Amir without informing us. I just hit Amir with a message and trying to see whether he is interested to visit the poor family and pay respect to the deceased. I guess Amir did not understood me. I felt so sorry that I cannot pay respect and help in burial process of Alef's father. After a week, and we were still in long term holiday. I prepared a rucksack and took buses for Yan from Penang. I immediately reserved some RM300 (USD 98.70) from my personal account for Alef's mother and buying few stuffs for condolence donation under the da'awa banner because of Allah and started to travel for Yan. I understood how Alef felt especially I had just lost my beloved grandmother where I cried like a crazy little kid and losing appetite for weeks. It was very difficult to access the rural area while I was alone. There was only one or two route of buses from Sungai Petani to Alor Setar through Yan. When I arrived in the rural area there was no bus anymore and by the time it was near Maghrib prayer service. I never informed Alef anything about my visit. I know Allah 'Azza wa Jalla was with me. Then I chartered a taxi at the little town and I cannot remember how much it was. When I arrived at the village only I called Alef just to inform him I am visiting his family because I cannot help with burial lest saying condolence. I feel so ashamed of myself because the matter of death is very important for me and it reminds me on how helpless I am before Allah if He does not sustain me with His precious Mercy.

After long, Alef had gave me a text message wishing me for Aidul'adha greetings. I am actually so happy to receive the message from him. I do not make many friends in my entire life and I am always grateful to Allah 'Azza wa Jalla for few friends and acquaintances that I have though we cannot see each other often. They are actually my pride as our beloved imam Ali r.a said: "The most helpless among men is he who cannot find a few brothers during his life time. But still is more helpless is he who find such a (good) brother but loses him". That is why I always feel afraid to be closer to newly-known brothers or friends. If they leave their footprints in our heart, we would feel like dying when the "time" ends. I do not care whether a "brother" is a Muslim or non-Muslim. The definition of a brother or a sister is very broad for me. Once they are considered as my "brother" it means their blood is also my blood. I would have to protect them like protecting my self.  If they are sad, I would have to comfort them like I comfort myself.

I called Alef when he miscalled me. Just talked with him like around 20 minutes and we talked about we missed each other and other friends while we were living in the hostel. All of friends had left us and we had lost contact. I just said to him I am grateful that I do not lost his contact. We talked about job and I could sense that he feels low self-esteem. I just told him the truth. I am a "da'awa cadre" but I never appear like one because I need to be alert with the situation and condition of society. I did postgraduate studies and it seems like I am pursuing it for career advancement but the real meaning is that I am doing this postgraduate studies to reconcile the gaps between traditional Islamic sciences and other fields. Nobody understood me even my younger sisters said that I am a "chowder-head" when they saw that I never grab any opportunity to further anything or getting good jobs for myself. 

I began to understood my destiny and facts of life when I was in Holy Mecca while I sat alone in the desert and pondering myself in al-Haram al-Sharif. And I felt so sinful that when I returned that I tried to return to the "responsibility" again. This is actually a very painful situation I think one would rather stabbed their heart with knife than to feel stuck like this. I told Alef to be patient and take a good care of his family. Do not worry about worldly affairs as we have faith in Allah 'Azza wa Jalla. He had already prescribed our fate in His tablet and our sustenance is within His wisdom. Just do not feel low and to strive hard to perform worship to Allah 'Azza wa Jalla. Learn more about kitabs and try to increase knowledge through religious discourses in his state. He still messaged me after we end our conversation and saying thanks for not forgetting him though he lives in the village. I just dropped few tears after reading that because it is me who should be thankful to him... I wish you happy Aidul'adha and in the Day of Atonement may our sacrifice brings us closer to Allah's Compassionate Mercy and Love. I am not good with words but you can feel it when I am closer to you, dear friends and brothers. I am just a nobody since I honor you as blessings of Allah for me :')  

            

I wish Allah 'Azza wa Jalla to have mercy on me because I am afraid Allah would throw me into the torments in the hereafter if my intention is wrong. I do not intend to tell anything here as something to boast nor getting names. I even mildly scolded Azren, who lived in the same hostel last time when he told his friends about my visit to Alef's house because that is not my intention to boast around instead I did it alone and not inviting others. I am doing that for Allah 'Azza wa Jalla and it is our traditions to comfort brothers and sisters who are in sadness. This is just a memory with Alef. He is one of my pride and I wish him to be among the da'awa cadres propagating His Names and teachings of morality by understanding the spirits which determined me to visit his house last time and why I keep them in my prayers :') 

Dedicated to my beloved prophet Muhammad s.a.w, his progeny and his companions may Allah always be in contact with them, bless them and be merciful to them. I also dedicate this post for brothers and sisters in faith and brothers and sisters in humanity. No matter where you are... Those who had been in contact with me are actually kept safely in parts of my heart. Allahumma salli 'ala Muhammad wa 'ala aali Muhammad wa sahbihi ajma'in.

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!