Hope is Possible -

Assalamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

While worshiping the God the Highest, a human-being is constantly in the battle with his enemies mainly the cravings and evil whispers. Both of them are influencing human to leave behind the God the Highest in their life.

Some of us perhaps talking within ourselves, if human should worship the God the Highest, why our inner selves are not reminding us? The reason is that, these two spiritual enemies are working their way to influence both of our heart and mind bringing us into the path of destruction.

Says the God the Highest which means, "Indeed the Satan is your obvious enemy" (Surat al-Baqarah vs. 168). Further, the God the Highest also mentions as it means, "Indeed desire always urging man-kind to evil" (Surat Yusuf vs. 53).

Because of these two spiritual enemies that human's heart keep staying in negligence and rebellious toward the Creator. Say that if it is fated these two enemies are not in existence thus human perhaps would know his Creator and loving Him. Even sunken in devotion to Him since it is the nature of every soul framed by human body to know Him and recognizing Him as their direction of reverence, worship and magnification.

Besides studying and pondering everything with the pure heart and mind, we realize from the studies of history that human-being of any period of life or location in the earth could never escape from disasters or those things disliked by them. This is a part of the God's order and divine predestination.

Disaster, tests and tribulations befall on everyone regardless they are a good or evil person, a Muslim or a non-Muslim. They would hit on everyone regardless whether he is a pious or a treacherous person. For e.g a person who could escape from poverty, if he is not facing the lack of means, perhaps is poor at his soul. A person who is poor at his soul never feel enough with anything that he has. Because of the lack of faith that he always feel the lack of everything in his life. Even more severe a person who is poor at his possession but also poor at the soul. At certain times, I could not avoid from questioning my faith and feeling ashamed to Him when this thought emerged in my mind at the midst of my life stage now. Furthermore... I just repented to the path about 10 years ago and trying hard to cope again with the responsibility and environment around. I cried alone when nobody sees me and trying to be close to Him as I do not know where else to go :'(

If human-being could escape from poverty, can he escape from sickness? Even a doctor also subjected to diseases. Doctors are human-being too. This is the Justice of the God the Highest where everyone are subjected to diseases. Disease is a messenger from Him to remind human-being. Even if a human is not lack of material possessions and not sick, but can he avoid from being a victim of slanders and backbitten by others? Human-being could not avoid from troubles caused by other human-being, even many of them were killed and murdered.

Other than that, can a human avoid from being hit with natural disasters such as tsunami, hurricanes, thunder and etc? Or can we avoid from losing our family members such as parents, wife, husband or children? Nobody wants that but He still inflicts it upon them. No one could escape from the tests and tribulations in this life. Muslims, non-Muslims, all human-being alike. If disasters and craps are equal on everyone, thus it is better for us to believer who is tested rather than being a disbeliever. It is better to be a worshiping slave while being tested rather than being a rebellious person in that period of tribulations.

Never in the history of man-kind that those who are inflicted by tribulations and tests are just the righteous ones, those who worship the God in devotion while the disbelievers are not stricken with sickness, never experience poverty nor never troubled by others. Everyone experience it.

So, it is better for us to be inflicted with disasters while worshiping and obeying Him since a genuine believer when being inflicted with troubles could take it as the remission of sins. The God the Highest only inflict us to teach us lessons and to raise us up from the torments of the hereafter since the torments in the hereafter is unbearable. For believer who is sinless, and he is pleased with the tests the the tests will be a testimony for the ascension of his position in His view. As for the treacherous person and further that he becomes a disbeliever due to hardships he encounters, thus the tests will turn to him as a curse of the God the Highest whether in the earth or in the hereafter. There is a hell in the world for him, and he will be tormented in the hell in the hereafter.     

So, there is no reason for us to not to worship the God the Highest. If we say that if we worship Him and we will become poor, then it is also the same when we do not worship Him. If we checked daily news about suicide, those who are shot dead, or those involved in road accidents, then we know the fact that not only obedient person who are inflicted with tests and tribulations but also those who do not even know Him.

Since our mind and heart could not evaluate besides being tainted by evil whispers and craving desires that we have forgotten the God the Highest. Whereas if we could evaluate and ponder, we could see that disasters and the craps inflicted upon man-kind are equal though not the same in its situation nor period of time. Why are we afraid of troubles and poverty when we perform our devotional worship to Him??

This is what I am trying to tell people around me when my mouth is tightly glued. This is also what I experienced, touched, feels and see with my own eyes while before I was also ignorant and talking like other brothers and sisters when some people come to me and talking about leaving possessions behind because those who told me are not practicing what they preached. What I realize since being dipped in tortures now is that we should just ignore others but only strive hard with sincerity only for Him. Just leave people behind and let them with whatever they wanted to think or to say.... 

Sealed with prayer for mercy, peace and love, amin!          

Happy 'Aidul Adha 1433 and Happy New Year 1434

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

Recently I have been really... really... really busy. So nice that I could write or speak in proper polite English. Usually I can't avoid to speak vulgar ones. It's just the way I talk with the people I was dealing with, haha. For sure that is not the characteristic of a member of the paradise. So, I would actually advise myself not to forget my responsibility and to remain "pure" like the lotus among the mud. The lotus can not leave the mud because it is surrounded with it and needs to cooperate with the mud to protect the balanced earth. 

First of all before I go further about what happened in this temporary earth and in the life of a slave of Allah. I would gladly wishing brothers and sisters happy 'Aiduladha and Happy Rossussanah 1434 H. It is our new moon and I think as always most people will recite the supplication and prayers in the masjid. Among all celebration, I actually in deep love with 'Aiduladha as its significance of Qurban or sacrifice to seek nearness to Allah warming my heart with the love to Him. I always remember and cherish my memory while in holy Mecca and those whom I had met during the pilgrimage season and high holy days there. It makes me realize who is my self and what I found is that I am nothing in this universe but He is full of Glory and full of Greatness. I am actually shedding my tears when the flashbacks come in my head hope nobody see it here, hehe :') 

Awareness on the Significance of Qurban and 'Aiduladha

This is only a summary of what I know about my faith, my ancestral tradition and my religion. I would like to call all brothers and sisters regardless denominations and schools of jurisprudence to keep the awareness about what is the significance of certain celebration and festival in our religion. I don't actually care whether brothers or sisters are from different schools of jurisprudence or from whatever denominations. We still profess the same prophet Muhammad s.a.w as our seal of prophethood, reciting the Quran and our faith is solely in Allah where we direct all of our hopes and dependance only to Him. 

Many young people are not really aware about the details of their religion but yet calling it as a "tariqa" of their life. I was also like that though I studied about Islam but that was only for examination papers. Not for "myself" to use it to perform pure livelihood in the way to seek His Glorious Holy Appearance in the hereafter. Nowadays I would question people but it seems that most of them do not understand it yet they think I am trying to put them down. I was not talking to them as a "second person" but I assume that I was talking to my another self when those questions come out. 

This has nothing to do with any mysticism. I beg those who accidentally stumbled by to please do not misunderstood me. I am tired people thinking that I am practicing mystical mysterious dzikr or whatever practices. I am just an ordinary Muslim man like brothers and sisters out there. I don't like people looking at me like a scary pathetic ghost and it makes me crying in my heart. I am a human and I live like other people watching TV, listening to radio and also typing in the computer now. Only Allah knows how I feel where I feel like I wanted to slap the face of "adik-adik" or kicking their ass when they approached me and asking me about some kind of turuq practices. Fortunately it is in the musalla or in the canteen so they were safe. Otherwise I will make sure they bleed their nose without they even realize it! I do pray for brothers of another "realm" but I do not do it for false practices. I am doing it for their benefit because I am always alone. I rarely made friend and as a responsibility of a fellow brother for them I reserved some "foods" and sprinkled them while walking to masjid early in the morning when everyone were asleep. I hate magics, sorcery and tricks! 

Sa'ie, Love of a Mother for Her Infant Son and Sufferings to Continue Survival

Briefly, 'Aiduladha is the peak of a series of high holidays. It is a tradition inherited from our father, Abraham and his son Ishmael. Well, this is according to our tradition's exegesis of Quran. An event that makes me feel touched was about the love of a mother to her son. Hagar as a mother had ran here and there at the Safa and Marwa seven rounds in order to find water after being left by Abraham a.s in the barren valley.  At that time infant Ishmael was around three years old as far as I could remember our elders recital of the chronicles in Arabic poetry form. I recalled everything that I heard when I was in Mecca, while in the Arafat desert and while traveling to Jeddah and Medina along the desert.

We imitated her deeds at the Safa and Marwa hills and I was almost dead with my mother there because so many people and they almost stepped me to death before a man helped me. My mother said that she does not care anymore if she dies, so I was so scared and I took her hand before someone hit me and I was the one who was down there. I never realize that I love my mother and I still have 'some' love in my heart that I thought had already gone after few sad incidents in my life. 

Hagar and Ismael a.s were sent down after Sarah a.s can't hold her jealousy and when Ishmael had teased her son, Ishaq a.s she just asked Abraham a.s to send them both away. That is normal I guess for women. I live with women and I am familiar with jealousy. My younger sister are always jealous to me when my mother gives me something but I actually never ask her anything. I always give everything that I have to others to avoid from "evil eyes". I hate to have issues with others but I just don't understand why they still love to find issues with me.

Back to the story, Abraham a.s just left both of Hagar and Ismael a.s with a prayer may the barren valley be blessed with sustenance which dearly brothers and sisters could read in the Quran Surat Ibrahim verse 37. These prayers were also pasted at the mihrab of our masjid here. Each time when I visit the masjid and pray there I would recite those prayers in my heart and looking at those verses. The valley is filled with metal hill. I am not talking without experience. I saw that the hills do no absorb the water when rain falls and it caused a big and ferocious flood in the Ajyad area.    

Qurban of Abraham and Ishmael a.s

It tells that once upon a time, father Abraham a.s came down to the Meccan valley to visit his wife, Hagar a.s and their son, Ishmael a.s. At that time, Ishmael was already a young man. While staying there, Abraham dreamed that he was slaughtering his son. The same dream happens few times so Abraham understood that the dream is a revelation of Allah (surat as-Saffat vs. 103-107). So, he told it to Ishmael and Ishmael agreed as it was a revelation and a commandment. Everybody at the ancient Jurhumite Arab village thought that Abraham had already losing his mind. 

Jamrat and Throwing Pebble Stones

A "man" appears to Hagar and told her everything. He said that Abraham a.s is going to murder his own son and claimed that it was a revelation. The man according to exegesis was a "satan" in the form of a human. When Hagar a.s heard the word "revelation", she just ignored the man and said that if so then let it be. She knows what Abraham a.s is doing. The "man" was disappointed so he leaves and "appear" to Abraham and Ishmael a.s. Three times the "man" appears to them while they were on their way to a hill to perform the "sacrifice" and commandment. At these three points where the "man" appears, they chased him away with pebble stones throwing. The points nowadays were known as jamrat and the act of these two prophets of Allah is imitated by Muslims all over the world during pilgrimage season. I recalled that we had thrown seven stones in each jamrat and the event happens in three days in Dzulhijja month. The spiritual and psychological significance of this actually is about how we deal with evil whispers. Whether we listens it and stay far from Allah or we just ignore it and be closer to Allah. 

Reward of Qurban and the Love of Allah Saves Everything

At the time when Abraham a.s almost hitting the neck of his son; his sword was directed to another point where he didn't really hit his son. But he hits a sheep. The reward of this sacrifice is what we could see today. Prophet Abraham a.s is blessed with the mercy to the universe for the end of the ages. It was through his prayers and sacrifices that his descents are blessed by Allah.

Other Version: Ishaq as the Subject

I have no time to slip the Old Testament but I am aware that the Children of Israel believe in Ishaq as the one who was sacrificed. I just read the Epistle of Barnabas which is the interpretation of the Old Testament by Jews who were the believers of Jesus a.s that stated this tradition of exegesis. For brothers information, since the end of September until now, our Jew friends are also in High Holy Days where they observed the Yom Kapparot for atonement where they would fast at that day and seeking forgiveness, New Moon of Rosh Hashanah, Sukkot festival and Simchat Torah. To tell everyone the truth; I don't give a damn to any version of the narration or on the differences of gentiles and non-gentiles. Allah blesses everyone regardless they are of any lineage and worldly fame means nothing. 

What I care is the spirit to seek nearness to Allah or G-d or whatever it is spelled because I am referring to the Highest Authority of the Universe, the King. During High Holy Days while waiting for our prayer times, I usually would chat with brother Eidan who happened to be a fellow Hadrami Arab descent but of different religion. We just discussed and sharing our family traditions. He is a Jew since his mother is a Jew but we are connected with the same Muslim paternal lineage of Iraqi immigrant in Yemen who was known as the Migrant though of different clans and of different flows.

Basically, these people were known as high sufis of various tariqa and could be founded among Sunni or Shi'a groups of Muslims whether in Yemen, Africa or Indian sub-continent. Both of us are not registered with those associations because for me I just realized that after I made researches as I began to feel weird after comparing our selves with other locals, I made consultations on behalf of my father and his family and checking with the authority while for brother Eidan he is of different religion and already migrating to their holy land.

Anyway I am not going to be registered nor revealing it widely to other relatives of my father side though many elders actually aware about that and it was discarded from young people knowledge because of some conflicts between clans. Maybe they were shy or afraid to tell people because of consequences that our people faced since Abbasid era. They are no different to the Umayyad dynasty. That is normal when we are at the height of "power" and it turns us to be "blind". It takes away our conscience and that is one of the thing that our elders always said to us on what they are afraid of. I know several those who "still" use the title but they behaved not accordingly to the noble morality. Some of them are married to our cousins too. What for the name if the "spirit" is dim and Allah hates us. 

Wishing

Again wishing everyone Happy 'Aiduladha and Happy New Year 1434 H. To those who perform pilgrimage in holy shrine in Mecca and the Masjid an-Nabawi, you don't know how fortunate you are especially the areas are very tight with authority supervision. Take the opportunity to purify yourselves from worldly matters and always ask to officers around if you have problem in the manasik and confused with the flow of the worship in the pilgrimage rituals. Don't listen to self-claimed "ustads" or you might confuse yourselves. Make sure what kind of pilgrimage you are performing because you need to bolt it in your "intention" and revise neatly what is the important process before the day come. For those who perform Hajj al-Ifrad especially in the early groups who arrived in Jeddah, please please please don't mix with other pilgrims or else you will repeat my mistake. I performed tahallul before I finished everything with the obligatory pilgrimage because I listened to my mother who wants to follow her roommates in the moassasah (foundation) to perform 'umra. I regret it until today after I listened to the lecture on the mistakes in rituals. It is not easy to return and performing it again as to ask forgiveness from Allah through the rituals. Hajj mabrur, wa sa'yan mashkur. May your performed rituals lead you toward charity and chastity. May your efforts being followed with gratitude to Him.

Allahumma salli 'alaa aali Muhammad wa 'alaa aali Muhammad wa sahbihi ajma'in...

Sealed with prayer for mercy, peace and love, amin!              

Some Basic Kitabs for Tawheed Lessons

Assalaamu'alaikum wa Rahmatullah!

I had jot down few kitabs for basic lessons regarding tawheed (monotheism) and syirk (polytheism) from Saudi authority publications other than Kitab at-Tawheed. Just for additional knowledge anyway.  Not all of Hanbalis are aggressive like in Saudi Arabia, everyone should note that. 

I just talked with a Tablighi brother whom I offer shelter in my room last night because he had already giving up his room to the office as he had finished his term but not his thesis. He was confused and couldn't differentiate a plain Hanbali and a Wahhabi who also claim themselves as Salafis. Salafi was actually a wide term, and being associated with the Hanbali school of jurisprudence.  I think many people too facing the same problem.

Later it is only associated with the Wahhabis who had bombed few historical places in Holy Land as to make it easy for them. Terms are sometimes confusing and not good for the unity. We denounce violence to humanity or any other creatures of Allah!!! Everyone must equally receive His mercy and love!

We need to always bear in mind that the Saudis are using Hanbali jurisprudence in legal term. Anything that they talk are actually in the framework of Hanbali madzhab. I personally believe that no one should claim that they are better over another and refrain from being aggressive over others without any rights. Respect all of the Four Imams equally. I can't find the hard copy of these kitab. I tried to ask few friends from an Islamic forum to help me out but the forum had already been closed.

1. Kashfusy-Syubahaat fit-Tawheed (Detection of Doubtfulness in Monotheism) - Muhammad b. Abdul Wahhab

2. Al-Usul ath-Thalathah (Three Fundamental Principles) - Muhammad b. Abdul Wahhab

3. Al-'Aqidah Wasathiyyah (Moderate Doctrine) - Ibnu Taimiyyah

4. Ad-Duruus al-Muhimmah li-'Ammah al-Ummah (the Important Lessons for the Public and Nation) - Abdul 'Azeez Abdullah b. Baaz

Salawat for prophet Muhammad s.a.w and his family and his companion. Happy celebrating weekly celebration, Friday and congratulations for those who had observed sunnah fasting yesterday. May you be blessed with His boundless blessings. Sealed with prayers for peace, mercy and love.