Assalaamu'alaikum wa Rahmatullah!
Quite sad, I could feel the musalla being left behind after there is no tablighi and islamic center kids like Shuhaimi or his friend, Ridhuan. These two kids had just returned home yesterday. Well, it is semester break, of course the musalla and even mosque would have less people in the congregation.
There was only three or four persons at that musalla and I had to take the charge to conduct the prayer services at the evening and night since nobody wanted to volunteer. I hate that when people notice my presence around them but that doesn't mean that I hate people around. Instead I admire them and I love them just like I love the prophets, the companion of prophets, the family of prophets and others. They are in sacred place where it is full with His love and peace.
It's not really easy to be an imam although it is just for salaat because I feel the burden of sins on my shoulder. I don't know about others feeling, but that is how I feel. That is why I respect those who take charge in conducting the congregational prayer services like brother Firdaus, brother Zaidi my ex-roomate, and many others. They are indeed courageous.
After the prayers, I stayed back at the musalla just to muse myself. Thinking about my sins in the day whether I had wronged His creatures and whether I had misunderstood His taqdeer (whatever is fated) on me. I also managed to strengthen my memorization of surah al-Mulk in the musalla so that is a good thing for me, all praises only directed to Him. It is among good suras and I love to listen to anyone reciting this surah because it is also good for them. The Lord would release us from the torments in the grave while waiting for the Judgement to come especially when we recite it before sleeping.
I heard brother Firdaus reciting the surah in salaat when he was in charge conducting the services before this semester break and before I followed brother Husaimi to Sri Petaling markaz that day, and it is very cool!!! I wanted to listen to him again but I am afraid that I would make him annoyed apart of feeling embarrassed I may appear to be like a three years old kid begging for something. Sincerely, he recites most of the suras very well and I am speaking the truth.
No matter who recites this surah and other surah which is ad-Dukhaan, I would stay there to listen until they finish because it is awesome and it reminds me about death, His creations, His torments and threats if we forget Him. I don't have gold nor silver to give to those who recite this, but I believe He would reward those who recite the Quran and thanks to those who indirectly helping me reciting the surah. You don't know how much that I had learned from you.
I had also found my late grandpa ma'athurat. It is a ma'thurat by the Perlis state government. I would memorize it firstly for His sake and secondly to honor my late grandpa because I had sinned him and thirdly to benefit my times remembering Him, His Will. Sealed with prayers for love and peace to all of fellow creatures of the God.