Just had dinner which is noodle in soup at the canteen. I don't like the chicken used in the soup since it smells. I would prefer to have only veggies especially in this stressful time where I have to run over my time to finish up few chapters for thesis. I was invited by Husaimi to have dinner with him. He's a Tablighi kid who is the balance of those older ones. Heard that they talked about the Qiblah in a hostel inside the campus is misguiding the people who pray there since the direction is not right. So, they wanted to inform the chief of the hostel and Islamic Center to do something about it.
I didn't feel like I wanted to meddle in. I have no mood to talk about anything related to their activities anymore after I closed the contact with those who previously came by to talk with me and left me without any notification while I had already being stuffed in the camp. I had violated the rule of using community property because we could not touch anything which belongs to the nations without being told what are their 'intention' once we are aware about ourselves. I'd told my family members too but they are stubborn. They do not want to listen to me and consider that as old traditions which only bring troubles to ourselves and restricting our movement. The search about our ancestral lineage was initiated by me. Lately, mum also begin to search her ancestral lineage through the network of her relatives. Her relatives are more established compared to dad paternal lineage because they scattered everywhere that makes it hard to find them or recognize them. I always prefer to act rather than just talking. I know it is good to advise each other, but we just do everything according to limit since everything has its own space. Act should work together with the talk.
After Isya' service, I heard something delivered by those kids from Pusat Islam who also prayed in the musalla. Maybe they are now collaborating with Tablighi kids. That is a nice thing to see, but I am already old. At least older than those who are doing first degree. So, I don't think my way of thinking is the same like other people and I must also respect others. We are travelers. We're not permanent in a certain place just like Bedouins wandering in the desert. I don't like to talk with my mouth, but with acts and mind. When I am typing this, my mouth is closed but my mind is not. It is talking and telling me to act. I believe, the same thing goes to other brothers and sisters who talk in medias through their writings. I can talk, and I don't mind to talk but I think my time for that is over. I don't care what those Tabligh kids wanted to think or say about me anymore. We just devote ourselves according to our way, as long as it is according to Quran and Sunnah I am sure it will never contradict each other.
Now, we come to important part where I listened to the points delivered by those Islamic Center kids, they talked about the importance of time for us. We are always careless with it even when we still remember how crucial it is. I myself always having this problem. It is not easy brothers and sisters, when we are alone. We try to pray to the God to always be with us and remind us. We don't have anyone even parents to tell us to do anything. So, everything must be planned. I am actually very bad in planning something, but I tried.
When we have free time, we tend to do something else and not doing any charity and penance to Him. Charity and penance includes things such as reciting Quran, memorizing Quran, reading sunnah articles, dzikr, and other beneficial activities. But when we are occupied, we would feel sorry to ourselves and think that it must be fun if we can do all sort of things that we had left during free time. Hurmmm, this is true. I always lament myself for this. I can't get the momentum and struggling. Is it because of internet? I believe so. It's not good for me perhaps. But now lecturers uploading everything in the portal so I have no choice but to look at the net. Tomorrow I have a class. I must put determination to fast for Yomul-Khams (Thursday) to beg for Quran from Allah.
And later, we do not appreciate our health to remember Allah 'Azza wa Jalla. When we are in sickness we perhaps remember Allah and pray to Him. I guess this is also true. When we are in war only we want to prostrate to Him. When we are not in haste in war, in occupation and others we won't even remember Him. We are so happy and we forget everything. This is human, in Arabic, we call human with the root word an-naas, which could also mean the forgetful.
Let us take the essence of the surah al-'Asr to benefit ourselves....
In the Name of Allah the Most Compassionate, the Most Merciful
Says Allah 'Azza wa Jalla:
By time
Indeed human is in loss
Except for those who believe and had done righteous deeds and advised each other with patience
To benefit the time according to the sayings of the God the Most Highest are:
1. Believing in the God, so we remember the God with dzikrs, prayers, and supplication services.
2. Doing righteous deeds, repenting our daily sins including for time wasted, be good to everyone, and other charity which is related to the first matter.
3. Advising among brethren with patience toward penance and charity.
These are basic things that we should understand, once we understood, we could apply this in daily life. I wish that Allah sayings become inseparable from my vessel and soul, amin :''(
Allahumma salli 'alaa Muhammad wa 'alaa aali Muhammad. May Allah protects everyone of us, brethren in faith from evil eyes.
Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace, and love, amin!
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