I Came to Know Love

Assalaamu'alaikum wa rahmatullah

This is a poem by Rabi'at Basri al-Adawiyah. She was an ascetic lady who dedicated her whole life only to worship the Lord and she is not a married woman. To understand this poem, actually she is talking to Allah, the Lord of the universe. She's not talking to any creature. She regards Allah as her Guardian Friend and the One she loves the most. There are several version of this poem from old Arabic movie of Egypt and also the modern one without musical instrument but only with synchronized human voice from Othman al-Rashidi.

I came to know love the moment I found Your love

And I have closed my heart from everyone except for You

And I wake up (at night) whispering to You

whatever hidden in heart while we don't see You

I have two loves for You

the love of inclination and the love for You are worthy for such love

The love of inclination is when Your remembrance keep me away from everything but You

And truly the love that You are worthy of is when You unveil the veils for me to see You! 

Truly the praise in either case (dear Guardian Friend) is not mine (dear Guardian Friend)

Truly praise in both cases belongs to You!

I have two types of longing for You

The longing of distance and the longing for the closeness so to be secluded in Your refuge

The longing of the distance is creating a stream because of the time of Your departure

The longing for the refuge's closeness is because the light of my life has been faded in Your light

 Despite of all my chantings (dear Guardian Friend)

I am not complaining my love (dear Guardian Friend)

I am content with whatever You have pleased for me

So, ladies out there please don't be sad if you are not married yet or looking around that your gal friends are married with children. I know about this since I have elder sisters. I listened to what they were talking about though I never say anything. 

When you're not married yet perhaps you say you are lonely but when you are married you will mumble other things like you can't enjoy yourselves while your husbands could come back home late after hanging out with their friends or watching football till late at night. You have to take care of your kids, your husbands are lazy to help you even to repair broken pipes at home and etc. Rabi'at al-Adawiyah only lives alone in a cave before her death at her 80's. I am not encouraging ladies to not marry with anyone that they love but just be patient and appreciate whatever that you have. If you are going to get marry with the one you love, then praise the God that your dream is fulfilled, haha.

Some of my undergraduate colleagues in my class last time, including a guy also talked about how lonely life without a girlfriend or boyfriend so they are competing among each other to get life partners. I just laughed in my heart since I thought that only girls would talk like that, hahaha. Human-being are funny but that is the reality of life. Don't make the definition of love and lonely so narrow... It's very broad and human soul tendencies are actually different from others. We could be lonely anywhere and everywhere. While on the earth we could still find people to hang around, but what if we are in the grave? Maybe buried together with others? LOL. So, to whom should we get back???

Before closing my eyes tonight, its the twin brother of death; I apologize to everyone who stepped in here if I posted anything wrong. I didn't mean to hurt anyone but just admiring this ascetic lady and I am just an ordinary mortal human-being. I pray for her soul to be blessed and may she be recompensed by the Lord on whatever she did not enjoy in this fake world since she did not live like normal people, insha Allah. I feel my kidneys are bleeding or its just a feeling???! BTW, Enjoy reading the poem....

Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace, and love, amin!

Memorizing Invocations from the Glorious Quran I

With the Name of the God, the Most Beneficent above all, the Most Merciful!

I'm just including the meaning in English. Lazy to type in Arabic and afraid that it would be defecated when printed out. English speakers could just first memorize the English meaning. Later, you may learn Arabic sounds. Don't worry about rituals, they are actually very easy once you grasped basic things. 

When you perform all of the rituals with understandings only you will feel His great love descends on you. You could see it with your heart and soul, but never with your physical eyes. Our eyes are deceiving and environment around us is deceiving us. I am also deceived by my eyes where my faith will also becomes weak if I believe what I see and yet I still believe them :'((((

We actually have two kinds of supplications and prayers to the God. The first one is these kind of prayers from divine letters in the quranic verses while another one is from sunnah or the traditions of the prophet. 

Recite al-Fatihah

With the Name of the God, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful 1 Praises be only to the God, the Lord of the Universe 2 The Most Generous, the Most Beneficent 3 King of the Day of the Law (judgement) 4 Only You that we worship, and only You that we follow 5 Show us please the straight path 6 The path where You had agreed upon. Not (the path) of those who had raised Your wrath, and those who went astray 7

Memorize al-Baqarah 127-128

Our Lord please accept us (our services). Indeed You are the One who hears everything, who knows everything 127 Our Lord, and make us the people who submit to You and from our generations the nations of those who are submissive to You, and show us our rituals and accept our penitence. Indeed You are the One who accepts repentance, the Most Merciful 128  

Al-Baqarah 286

Our Lord! Please don't punish us if we forget or fall into error. Our Lord! Please lay not on us the burden like what had been burdened on those before us. Our Lord! Put not on us the burden greater than we have strength to bear. Pardon us we beg You, and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us dear Lord, You are our Salvator and Protector and give us victory over the ingrates 286

Memorize little by little and check the translation in your glorious Quran exegesis. Don't burden ourselves but always assume ourselves as the seeker of knowledge. We are now traveling in the Universe and going through many experiences in this travel. Whether they are nice or foul but we are trying everything. 

Don't be shy to seek knowledge because nobody is perfect. This is actually the advice for myself but it may also motivate others. Begin once you had memorized the verses for supplications like after the salaat services. Pause for few moments to think deeply on what are the messages of divine words mean, may Allah helps everyone with His guidance.

May Allah be Merciful on everyone in this period of malefactors and slanders. Sealed with prayers for peace, mercy, and love to brothers and sisters in faith.

Da'awa: Darul Arqam Singapore

Assalaamu'alaikum wa Rahmatullah!

I spontaneously typed this out after watching TV al-Hijrah in a segment called Sinar Baru. It talks about Darul Arqam and it is a charitable organization. It is for my personal record and I hope to visit the center if I went down to Singapore, may Allah permits it. What I found interesting is that, it uses English as the medium for propagation as it is widely understood. Sometimes this small matter could also help to boost people understanding toward the path of the God.

I am glad to see that although Singapore has no 'Muslim' leaders but they still could run their organization to help reverts of Islam. I actually detest to call reverts as Muallaf. I believe that their faith is more strong than those who were born as 'Muslim' or identified as 'Muslim' in their ID. They have to face great tests.

The center also has a unique concept which is called as befriender whom are the volunteers to be friends and approaching the reverts for activities together. It seems almost the same like some karkons had done to me when they approached me but they had left me due to some constraints or many other factors like maybe shy. I had called some of them to read some books in private in my room not because I wanted to debate but I wanted to pay respect to their sages beside inviting angels and for Allah to bless my room and others around my room. I don't know what those karkons had to shy off from me because I was the one who feels shy to them. My iman is so weak that I always had struggles in my self and 'aqidah. I also have a very low-self esteem, well if I compare myself to them because I am not good in many things. I also believe Allah is placing hell on me because of my sins was so great toward Him. I know He is all Merciful, but maybe because I am just a lowly creature that made me feel unworthy.

Even now, I am also having struggles and I believe it will continue until I face the biggest test in this Universe which is the death. Everyday I am waiting for death and the resurrection but I am still not ready with my hideous self and poor practices in offerings to Allah. I actually don't blame those karkons. Instead I understand them. I am proud of them but I just feel bad when saying farewell as I had already expected but I keep mingling with people around instead of avoiding crowd. I am afraid of straying from silaturrahim after its establishment. I also prays for them to be in their jama'at that they had chosen to be may they not walk far from what they had said to me as I am witnessing everything under His holy view and always supporting whatever is good for the nations and humanity.

Sometimes I might be using some analogies or metaphors that might hurt others because they might be very hard to be understood. I will always apologize to everyone because Allah would never forgive me if everyone do not forgive me on my sins on them. That is normal, we are weak human. Allah is always perfect. That is why we adore Him, the Highest above all. Currently I am learning how to shout adzan because my voice would scare people away rather than calling people to pay homage to Him. I feel it is a must when we learned basic things regarding our worship to Allah.  

Today is Friday, the first of the holiest day in a week. Not all of the people are celebrating twice holy days but today is the beginning of holiest days for those who seek knowledge for practices and heart purification. Please recite salawat for prophet, his noble companions and his family and help me and other brethren in faith with your precious supplications if you happened to step in this humble site. I don't know how many people visiting here. I don't want to know because it is not a necessity. I assume that I am talking to my mind recording events around, lessons and expressing love to Lord. That's why I never put any detector.

This evening about 18 minutes before maghrib is actually a good time for supplications to Allah. You may supplicate in your heart and mentally even while walking or driving home. Please pray for everyone's iman to be strengthened by Allah through His guidance and ruhul quddus. We need brethren love and mercy in term of prayers. Many thanks for support. Sealed with prayers for peace, mercy and love. 

Halaqah: Lesson from Surah al-Mujadilah

Assalaamu'alaikum wa Rahmatullah!

Just returned from the mosque. I feel quite relieved and thankful to Allah that I could perform most of prayer services today through congregational way and also rawatib prayer services.  Well, rawatib prayers are not as important as five main daily prayer services but just optional. I choose to perform that simply because I love Allah Azza wa Jalla.

Sometimes people would appoint me to be a leader for small congregational prayers in some places. I would feel bad if I become a prayer leader without performing full part of prayers including the optional ones because I personally believe the rightful person to be a leader must be a person who is attached to daily code regardless obligatory or optional. However, this is just my personal belief, it does not apply to others. I read something in Sultan Muhammad al-Fateh of Ottoman stories and his characteristics also influence my thoughts.

Tonight, our Arab congregation have their halaqah (learning circle) and a syeikh (elder) would explain about different lessons according to different days in a week in the gap time after maghrib service and isya' service. They talked about surah al-Mujadilah. It is the 58th surah in the glorious Quran and we may see it in parah (part) 28th.  Everyone coming across this post may open up your tafseer (exegesis) of the glorious Quran that you have in whatever language that you have. His mercy and love to His servants know no language. 

We would just simplify our note into points here so everyone could gain benefit, but it would be better to recite the verse whenever we have free time to spend around. This is what we do when we feel empty without any companion. We would meditate and recite the verses that we could remember.  

Regarding Dzihar

1. Basically the surah talks about a lady who has a dispute with her husband and her name is Khawlah binti Tsa'labah and her husband is 'Aus bin as-Samit. 

2. The God listens and saw the event and He declares it in the surah (divine letter) through the tongue of His holy prophet Muhammad s.a.w. Nowadays, we are reciting His words with our tongues. It is about the husband who had divorced his wife according to ignorance period manner by declaring that the back of his wife is as his mum. This act is called as dzihar in our Arabic. 

3. So, the God says in His holy words that the divorce took place although he never declares that he divorced his wife. If he wants to get back to his wife again, he must free a slave. If there is no slave to be freed, then he must fast for two months without stop or if he could not perform the kaffarah (sentence) fast, he must treat 60 paupers with food. 

Concerning Conspiracy 

1. The God says that He knows everything in the heavens and the earth. He knows what is being discussed by groups of people, and He is noting every words spoken from the lips of people who conspire. Whatever they speak out in their heart or aloud, the God will certainly display everything that they did in the hereafter. 

The God says that conspiring something which would be sinful acts over the other is forbidden but yet many still doing it. These people greeting the other not according to what has been taught by holy words and mocking the God to torture them from their evil acts. The God made the promise that they would surely receive the torment that they desire in the place to torture them since they love to return to the horrible place.

2. Faithful servants who talk about something in a secret counsel and in hidden place should never discuss about committing sins, enmity, and betraying the messenger of the God. They must only speak in hidden or in a secret counsel about charity, righteousness and piety to the God.     

3. The God tells us that conspiracies are from Satan because it wants the faithfuls to grief while those conspiracies can never harm no one without His permission. The faithfuls must be dependent to Allah only and not to believe that conspiracies could harm them without His permission.

Politeness in an Assembly with the Messenger

1. The faithfuls must give way for the assembly, may the God gives them huge space. When ordered to rise up, thus they must rise up for charity, righteousness and piety! The God will honor the faithfuls and granting them wisdom. 

2. Before privately consulting the messenger concerning special issue, give your donation to the paupers as it is better for you.    

3. If you can't make the donation for paupers before privately consulting the messenger and the God forgives you your sin, then obey the order of the God through the performance of prayer services, paying the zakah, and obey the holy God and His noble messenger! 

Prohibition about taking the enemy of the God and His messenger as companions

1. People who violate His order are not the companions of the faithfuls. Why God says this? Because they are lying while taking the oath. A person who violate his or her oath are the hypocrites and they are the most hideous creatures amongst His creatures.

2. Why do they become like that? They had chosen to follow the Satan who made them forgetful to remember the God.  The people who choose to follow the Satan are the Hizbussyaithan (the men of the Satan).

3. The God says there is no love between the faithfuls and the adversaries of the God even if the adversaries and the faithfuls are in a family. 

4. The God helps the faithfuls with His boundless mercy which is the faith implanted in their heart and the ruh (guidance and faithful spirit) from Him. These faithful servants are the Hizbullah (the men of the God). This hizbullah is not the political party in Lebanon! It is a generic term for the men of the God. It means that these people are those who obeys Him. They are faithful, righteous and performing charity.

Then the syeikh also talked about the stories between Moses and Khidr regarding wisdom. Since tomorrow is optional fasting day for twice holidays, we should sleep early and wake up early so that we may get the birkah (blessings) in sahur. Later we would talk about Moses and Khidr in their rihlah (journey) full of wisdom if the God permits it, insya-Allah...     

Allahumma salli 'ala Muhammad, wa 'ala aali Muhammad. Ka-maa sallai-ta 'ala Ibrahim, wa 'ala aali Ibrahim. Wa baarik 'ala Muhammad wa 'alaa aali Muhammad. Ka-maa baarak-ta 'alaa Ibrahim wa 'ala aali Ibrahim. Fi-l 'aalameena innaka hameedum-majeed. Sealed with prayers for mercy, peace and love, amin!