What does it mean to be Muslim for a Family?

Assalaamu'alaikum wa Rahmatullah!

I manage to retrieve back some of these notes that I jot down from last month. I went to Sultan Mizan Zainal Abiddin mosque and listened to a lecture on a chapter from the book written by Fathi Yakan in the gap time before Isya' prayer. This book is quite famous in Malaysia with the title "Apa Ertinya Saya Menganuti Ajaran Islam?"

The ustad had mentioned where Fathi Yakan highlighted six matters. That day, they talked about the fifth matter and I was so unlucky as I had missed few matters earlier and also the last matter highlighted. They talked about being a Muslim from the aspect of family, creed, worship, and morality. Why do Mr. Yakan choose this topic for the discussion? Because we want a society that reflects Islamic characteristics which could be seen in the soul of everyone.

How could we call non-Muslim toward the God if we are showing bad examples to them? If we want to establish a sanctified nation, we should have a model to be seen by others. For example, before we begin our meals, we would recite supplications to the God or begin our meal with manners. Muslim family must be a model and guidance for others. If a house is in chaotic situation, what can we show to others? Thus, we must try to be Muslims in family angle and have to be caring to the community and taking the responsibility to be in service to others.

  

Says the messenger of the God may the God be in contact with him: "whomever ignores his brothers and sisters in faith, they are not apart of the Islamic nation." - narrated by Bukhari. 

As for example, how many persons before fallen into their sleep are thinking about the problem faced by the nation or how many of us had been thinking about our parents? How about people who are close to us? Remembering parents is a responsibility of every Muslim. Everyday, we must recite al-Fatihah for them no matter they are alive or had already returned to Him and protected under His mercy. Parents are the reason where we are here. Without them as the reason, we are nothing in the Universe. When our life growing better, we tend to forget our parents until we have no time to return home and see them whether they are in good condition or else?   

The responsibility of every Muslim is to prohibit vice and performing charity. Our responsibility had already been performed when we asked others to be together in charity and chastity even though those whom we are calling toward charity refused to follow. When we had already knocked the door and they refused to open it up, we are free from the sins and responsibility.  Our role is only to prohibit vice and promoting charity. Being in accordance with the glorious Quran and Sunnah. We perform our responsibility by telling others about what is Islam to the society and trying to establish it in our society or community.

Then Muslims are responsible to form a family with Islamic values. Establishing Islam in the house begins with the education where parents must teach their children to respect the teachings of the God which is Islam and the values in the teachings. The parents are responsible to bring everyone in the family to Him for example making the five obligatory salaat times as the time to remember Him without any interference. 

Muslim parents have the responsibility to ask the people in the family to protect their 'aurah (modesty) as what had been mentioned in surah an-Nur verse 53. An example in asking others to protect their 'aurah and in the same time teaching the family members about the way of life through presents according to sunnah such as veils or beautiful muslimah or muslim dress. A husband are obliged to ask his wife to change her skimpy clothes to better ones if she happens to wear it since she would be working 8 hours with male non-muhrim colleagues.   

Convey Islam to family members and to our selves as what had been mentioned by the God in His holy verses: "never call to the worship of other than the God for you will be dipped into the bitterness" (surah ash-Syuraa'). Teach our close family members and relatives about His Oneness, never proclaim that there are other power with the authority as possessed by Him. We must help and have the care in preserving the creed of our family member. When they are deviating, we would advice them to return to Him.

Check in surah at-Tahreem verse 6th where it mentions that hell fire would be ignited with stones and human, so we must be really careful with our daily conduct. We always think that it is easy when we perform salaat, the God would forgives us our sins just after we perform the salaat. But are we sure that our charity and salaat performed are accepted by the God? We should stop blaming our environment. We must first begin with our selves living our live as Muslims and playing our roles in our family. 

Everyone dreams of a good nation and receiving His forgiveness. This is a general matter, and family institution role is crucial in forming an Islamic family. A husband has a heavy responsibility. The sins committed by children will also be the share of the sins to the parents. The responsibility of promoting charity and prohibiting evil and vice is a very heavy responsibility. 

The glorious Quran shows the way to achieve the goal according to His teachings where it focuses on the family. When a couple get married, their marriage should not only about beauty or how handsome is the groom. The intention must be rightful because of the God and not because of the beauty of the girl or the guy that we want to get marry to. Nikah (marriage) is a reason and a sunnah for the establishment of a good and blessed family. 

When a couple entering the marriage contract, they must be readily to bear the trust from the God in the upbringing of the future generation and soul as what had been mentioned in surah az-Zumaar (I can't recall the verse, I am sorry). Everything that we do in our daily life is actually because of Him. After that, the couple would be stepping into the establishment of a society who understands the way of life according to His teachings. It is not merely a marriage contract where a man and a woman are willing to share their life but more than that where they are responsible in the establishment of a Muslim family. No need for an overly "bersanding" ceremony after the marriage contract and it would be best if the feast for marriage reception being done without waste. As to say, our acts must be viewed through religious rites perspective.

I'm going to print this version of notes typed in our national language and giving it to my newly-wed sister and her husband. I don't want them to just get away without revising their responsibility toward our Islamic society although they had already going to marriage courses before their marriage!!!! 

May Allah be in contact with prophet Muhammad s.a.w and his family and his companion. Allah please bless our society no matter whatever we are. Bless us with Your boundless mercy and forgiveness. Sealed with prayers for peace, mercy, and love for brothers and sisters in faith, amin.