Hassan al-Banna: A Muslim Reformer

Assalamu'alaikum wa Rahmatullah!

Alhamdulillah, praise be to Allah. I have finished almost all of the paper. Now I just have another one paper to go and it is not a burden anymore for me. I had covered almost all of the topic, may Allah keep my memory long going for the subject this Monday, Amin!

Yesterday night I went to a brother room. A Kelantanese guy and six years younger than me. It is just a ziara (visit) because I was on the way to the restaurant and I had not taken my dinner yet at that time. Then suddenly rain poured down. The brother thbored : ) He then start talking about politics. Well, I actually hate politics it makes me feel

But then he hits the right button when he talked about Hassan al-Banna. I love this figure. I had read some books about this figure and I have a huge respect to Ikhwanul Muslimin (Muslim brotherhood). The brother said that the guy was shot dead. I think that I had read about him and also his idealism last time but it may be long ago. May Allah bless his pure soul, aamin!

Very nice idealism and the late Mr. al-Banna's idea had made me realize the importance of Arabic although I had learned it since I am a young kid. The language does not attract me at all because it was around me. Now when I really wanted it, it always distanced itself from me. Lately, I had discovered that my paternal line is of Yemeni descent although we do not use the title sayyed (lord). It makes me more keen now to go back to my root. Without our silsilah (family line), we had lost everything including our religion. I had lost Islam when I was 15 and becoming a silent Buddhist. It began since I was 13 years old but I profess the statement of belief when I was 15.

I listened to the brother with respect about what he thinks regarding politics either in Malaysia or abroad. Well, most of all Mr. al-Banna's idealism is not really about politics. I am so relieved as I hate politics. I am just into Allah and the prophets teaching. Then it is about the purpose of our life. As a Muslim, my purpose is only You O Allah! How chaos is our Muslim nations without proper understanding of the basis of Islam.

I am planning to read more about Mr. al-Banna idealism. I wish that there are also books about him in English or Chinese :'(   

May Allah forgive us our sins, and please O Allah do not Ye count us our despicable acts due to our ignorance and forgetfulness, Amin!

'Aiduladha Mubarak

Assalaamu'alaikum wa Rahmatullah!

I wish everyone 'aiduladha mubarak, 古爾邦節快樂, 祝願安拉把全人遮蔽吧 kurbang jieh kuaile, zhuyuan Allah ba quanren zhebi bah!  I pray so that may Allah protect everyone in this uncertain period near the resurrection.

I am now still in the midst of our examination since I still have other two papers which are the Global Political Economy and International Relation. It is quite frustrating that I could not enjoy the celebration like others but I am thankful to Allah for having His mercy on me so that I could see the celebration this morning and pray communal prayer in the mosque.

Yesterday I fast so that Allah will grant His mercy on everyone. I had not performing fast since long after being advised by someone that it is not good to fast so much as I am just a skinny guy, haha. Frankly I don't really care about myself. But as to say everything has its right so I decided not to over the limit. Besides Allah will hate me.

This 'aiduladha will always be a remembrance for me. I went for Hajj pilgrimage last six years. I really miss the moment and the Holy Land since then. Today the people will getting ready to go for Mina for jamrah. I will always remember what I had experienced in Mecca. It is an interesting spiritual journey and hope that I could go through it as many times as possible. I love it so much, hope that my Arabic will get better again also I could memorize Quran in full insya'Allah : )

May Allah bless our honorable father, Ibrahim (as), and his family. Blessed be our prophet Muhammad (saw) and his family and his companion also everyone. 

Master's level exam experience and bad thoughts

Peace,

Ya Allah! I have a very hard time yesterday answering the exam question. I think it is my own fault cause I have lack of focus during my revision times. Last few weeks I have a problem when the office had put a new roomate into my room. But I could sense that the roomate has a bad intention when he saw me. I am very afraid that I could be slandering people with my thought but it turns out that the old guy might have something wrong with his mind. 

He just came by into my room and becoming extra-friendly. It is still ok with me if he just talks. But later he came to my bed and pretending like talking to me as a father to a son. Later massaging me when he said I had red rashes at my neck. I did not ask anyone to massage me and mind, my father never did that to me. Later he talked something in his language which is Indonesian language where I could not really understand. He talked something like the "things" under my pants is something and something. Why do a newly meet friends need to talk about those private things? It is not only that, he moved my stuffs on the table and asking me to onn my computer. As a matter to be polite to elders I just onn it, but I did not realized that he was stalking my password. For the next morning I had forgotten to keep my computer into the closet as I have a morning class. He used my stuffs without consent and starting checking my details in the computer. What kind of person is this? 

As to avoid myself from being a victim of sin. I have to run to musalla (surau) at the level beneath first level of our floors. I slept there and trying to gain back my focus by reading some notes before the revision week. I've been several nights there. Now do I understand how the Tabligh guys feel when they sleep in the musalla. It is peaceful there. I don't think that I need to sleep in a room anymore after that. Room is just a place to keep stuffs and to change clothes before prayers. 

I went to the hostel's office and trying to complaint about the new roommate. But they asked me to tell them in detail. How could I tell them about that old guy touching me? I could only tell them he used my laptop without consent. I'm still bound to the rule not to tell people about the things that could bring our dignity down by telling others' evil deeds.

I went back home just few days before revision week begin and there I tried to cherish my mother by following her to religious classes at mosques. Besides I learned many new things which are not really new. I just found them new after my repentance. I did not bring my stuffs for exam back because I do not want to see that insolent old guy in my room when I take my stuffs which was locked in the closet after I made complaint. 

And when I came back, it is a disaster for me when I answered my Policy Making and Politics in the EU paper yesterday. I feel so guilty toward my parents not to forget my lecturer. Parents gave me money to further my study after a period where I am jobless and just staying in my room. After the exam, bad thoughts do came to me like trying to commit suicide because I feel so ashamed to everyone including to Allah but I quickly realized that it is a grave sin by trying to take our own life without Allah's permission. If I killed myself I still have to answer Allah and how could I turn up myself in front of Him? O Allah, please forgive me my sin from my bad thoughts! I am a useless slave of You.   

Anyway what had happened had just happened. Maybe this is a kaffarah (payments) to all of my sins or simply another test for me because Allah might want to see my faith. I still believe Allah will save me no matter what happens. So I will try to hold on here. It is already a past. Now will determine the future. I still have other three papers. I will try to get my focus back with the help and guidance from Allah.

May Allah bless everyone and forgiving our sins, Allahumma salli 'ala Muhammad, wa 'ala aali Muhammad!

Arabic greetings for Chinese speaking Muslims

Peace,

I had read a post in one of our sisters' blog, she has a very interesting point about people who are well-versed in religious studies always using some Arabic terms or greetings which we as publics can't really understand. I am also thinking the same in this matter and I am pretty sure others too agree with this.  It is not about denying anyone's ability in any studies, it is just for the sake of understanding and convenience. All of us are learning and will always learn.

This had brought me to my conversation with a respective Muslim Chinese friend from Gansu. Gansu is located in Northwest of China and a strong fort of Islamic adherents in China. I have a huge respect to this province of China and once I met the brother who talked with me, I already could guess where he came from based of his loyalty to Islamic teachings. They actually just like Malays using lots of Islamic or Arabic terminologies in their everyday Chinese. I would like to share this with our brothers and sisters Muslim Chinese for your own convenience. 

This is just to show to everyone that not only Malays like in Malaysia has this culture but it is a wide-spread culture.  Muslims who speak no Chinese too can learn. I would love to encourage everyone to learn Chinese and if possible other Chinese dialects for Da'awa purpose. Till now I had a little bit made the jama'a in the surau at my place of staying realize that sino-speaking Muslim do exist in Malaysia. We are all brothers in humanity and the most important thing are brothers and sisters in faith.

I think it is good for sinophone Muslim to get some information about this so next time you can help other people in the term of educating them about Islamic terms or greetings. I had learned the first Islamic greetings from my Muslim Chinese friend which is 賽倆目 or pronounced as Sailiamu. It simply means Salaam from Arabic with the meaning peace in English but written in Chinese script and sound.

The other variant of 賽倆目 is  色蘭 in pinying is pronounced as Selan. It is still the same Salaam but can be used in Chinese text SMS as it is a simplified version. To answer it, simply say 回色蘭 (Huiselan, or Veeslan). It is the sound for Wassalam.  Means salam kembali or peace returned to you.

The other one which is a bit longer is 安斯倆目阿來空 (Ansiliamu'alaikong). It is from Assalamu'alaikum in Arabic which means peace be upon everyone. To answer, simply say, 我來苦目阿賽倆目 (Wolaikumussailiamu) or Wa'alaikumussalam.   

So, next time our Muslim Chinese sisters and brothers can use these greetings among each other in text message. I know most of you are having hard time to type because I am also having hard time before and simply typing wrong characters for those greetings. Thanks to friendly brother who lives at level 7th, brother Xian who taught me these and thanks to puan Aliya for raising this in her blog. It is a good sharing. May Allah grants them bountiful of blessings.

I always forgotten about this once I raised it to myself but when I saw this in her blog  I've got back my lost memory and spontaneously typing it here before I forgot it again.  There are lots more on these Islamic terms in Chinese characters and meaning in Chinese. I will update them next time whenever I am free. I hope next time, our Muslim Chinese brothers and sisters could help writing more materials in Chinese for everyone especially in Malaysia : )

Till then, I pray for everyone peace and please pray for my exam this Wednesday. May Allah bless all of our faithful brothers and sisters, ameen.    

Kedah heritage, my Kedah memory

Peace,

Good day, I would like to share with myself about the history of  our life in the states where my mother and father spend their life times there during their childhood and youth times. Also the state where I was born and where my ancestors landed so that I may not forget my root and heritage. 

 My mother was born in Sanglang district of Kedah state. While my father was born in Kodiang in Kubang Pasu district. I don't really know what Sanglang means. I checked in some dictionaries and they said it means aborted calf. While Kodiang came from Thai compound words which means Red Hill. However my mother was raised in Arau district of Perlis when her parents exploring new lands there together with those Thai speaking villagers from Thai side during those days where immigration wasn't so strict as today. Both of my parents are from Northern Kedah. My father has to move to Alor Setar and later to Singapore after his father passed away and his mother had already passed away when he was still in cradle.

That is a bit an introduction about my parents. In my part, I was born in Sungai Petani in Central Kedah. Just like our fathers, we are nomads. We use to move from places to places. I always lamenting myself for always being a nomad, we can't even develop friendship with people around like normal people.

Although raised in other states, our heart is still the heart of Kedahans and we never forget our dialect. Well sometimes I do try to hide my dialect by speaking in southern Malay dialect but that doesn't mean that I am shy of my northern heritage. I know many archaic Kedahan words which are only used by people around 80's because I use to speak with our elders. 

We love our states although we might feel that we have nobody anymore in Kedah after grandparents died.  My parents are still fond of our state and will try to find reasons to return back for few days just to express their saudade to the state. Hurmm, saudade is a Portuguese word. I don't know how to translate it into English. But it means the feeling that someone is missing someone or something with the memory traced their way back to the old days.

I still can remember when my late maternal grandparents were still there in Arau. May Allah bless their soul in the world there. We had sticky rice with dried fish or mango. Ramadhan and Syawwal that we spent together. Grilling meat and fish beside grandparents house. Walking in the sugar cane plantation. Learn to drive motorbike and fall down, laughing to my sister's driving skill while me too can't even drive the bike at that time. 

But to be frank, I don't really have any good or close childhood friend in Kedah or Perlis. I just know my siblings and few cousins. I still remember a Quran teacher who taught me some portions of Moqaddam at my grandparents village when I was a kid. I called him, Pak Dollah.

My half  Muang Yuan Thai cousin, I am so sad for him. Muang Yuan is another name of Lanna kingdom in North Thailand. His mom was detained in Thailand for stealing accusation, we believe she never did that as she is a very noble and hardworking woman. My grandmother loves his mom so much and we always recite moqaddam surah and listen to her recitation when we meet her. We never meet her anymore after she went back missing in Thailand. His son which is my cousin becomes lost. He used to be a good and polite boy.

One of my colleague during my bachelor degree time is in Jitra. Few others who are not really close to me are in Alor Setar, Padang Besar, Kuala Perlis, Pendang and Yan. I only had been to one of my hostel mate house in Yan which is in Central Kedah because I did not have the chance to visit his dad's funeral during our first year. Allah bless my friend dad's soul. I went there and getting to know his family, talking with his mom and expressing my condolence to the family.

Till now, we still heading north during Eid festival. This coming Qurban celebration is almost near in the midst of students answering exams. I am not sure either my parents will come back to north. My father was affected by stroke during the first Ramadhan this year. I am worried for him and for my family. Our state too is having hard time dealing with this recent flood. And this Wednesday, I will be sitting for exam.

I myself faced many problems like stressed out of myself when I have bundles of assignments, a psycho roomate, and I am so sad when I see my dad become so restless and not in peace during my holiday for revision week. Insya'Allah, I will try to focus and taking my heritage and state as a motivation.

Our state has this motto, Kedah pantang kalah, walau sakit jatuh dan rebah, pasti bangun semula. It means that we will rise again no matter how hard the obstacles had made us fallen. This motto is a lyric from our state's soccer team song.

Although now the state soccer team is not really as it was in the once upon a time glorious position but it is still illuminating. We don't have to be a winner, but just do not lose hope. I had gone through many experiences if not as many as others, but I still had gone through these experiences of 24 years old of my lifetime. I pray that Allah SWT grant us strength to go through this challenges in our life.

Till now, blessed be everyone and may Allah protects us from evil eyes, smile always ya baba : )

 

Flood in Northern Malaysia, November 2010

Peace,

I had heard news about the flood that happened in Northern Malaysian states especially our Kedah state, Perlis, and also Southern Thailand. The victims of flood that died in Kedah till now is 4 persons while in Thailand I guess around 100 or maybe more.

Rain pours down for more than 3 days and I also think that Thailand has to open up the gate of their dam in South Thai to ease the consequence of flood in Thailand. It makes southern states, I mean northern Malaysian states being affected by the flood earlier because flood usually happens in December and not  in November.

I remember that the worst one happens around ten years ago, we have to celebrate Eid Mobarak in flood at my grandparents house with snakes swimming near our feet and faeces floating around. But this one is even worse.

I had talked with my friend and my ex-colleague during my bachelor degree who lives in Jitra of the Kubang Pasu district this evening. He told me that their food stocks are almost done and they can't buy anything from the shops since they are all closed. I am worried that they would get starved and disease would spread out due to the flood. Our beloved state's economy might facing downturn too.

In the Kedah Lanie blog, I had get some information that few Madrasas are sunken too. Poor religious studies students.  The worst one is in the Ma'ahad Tarbiyya Islamiah Derang in Pokok Sena, Alor Setar in our state's capital. For more information or to assist them, please contact Ustaz Abu Khair at 6-019-56228611 or Ustaz Qamaruddin Qassim at 6-019-5228455 or at 6-019-4782708. I am also worried about those religious studies students in Baling, Sik, and Kuala Nerang districts not to forget, those in South Thai.

 

I guess this is among the tests from Him on everyone in the states. Hope that He grants everyone with faithful strength, patience and taqwa to go through this test. 

O the Beneficent!

Peace,

A good prayer delivered by Khaled Zaaher, a Yemeni singer. I don't know how to translate it into English but I can feel the meaning. The calling to the Most Beneficent who grants the prayers of servants and the love toward Him by servants for non-stop blessings and for what He had gives every servant. 

This prayer is in Yemeni Arabic. I will also having hard time transcribing the sound because I just learned standard modern Arabic in our evening religious school and in religious secondary school. That is before I turned away and shift to secular school when I was 15 and becoming a anti-hadith or anti-sunna,  beside being a full Buddhist by chanting Three Gems refuge after I am disappointed seeing Muslims attitude. Well, I was 15 at that time. Lord Allah the Most Beneficent still having His Mercy on me although I turned myself away from Him.

O Allah, please forgive me my sins, my ancestors sins, my parents sins, and forgive our brothers and sisters in faith sins, grant us our wishes for good benefits, amin!

Free Circulation Materials in Chinese Anyone?

Peace,

I had found some free circulation books and leaflets at the mosque in our vicinity last Tuesday. I took some of them and managed to get two small English books and two small Chinese books about Islam. They are just simple reading stuffs and I had already took many of them when I visit mosques under JAKIM (Malaysian Islamic Development Department) authority. The first book with blue cover is with the title "Prophet Muhammad the Leader of Human."   

I don't really take heed on English materials because I know I can get many of them without any problem. So on goes to Malay version of those materials. I'm just concerned on the stuffs in Chinese and if possible Tamil but I guess Muslim Tamil (Indian) community already have strong foundation for religious reading materials since most of them could speak in Malay. Once they arrived in Malaysia old days, they established mosques for their community and religious schools for their kids. They could teach religious studies with Tamil to their younger generation. 

I had seen a Muslim  Tamil student showing me his Fiqhi (Islamic Jurisprudence) exercise book  written in Tamil which is his mother tongue when I attend a tution class for my PMR exam. Tution, a classic belief by most of parents back then that it could help their child excel in exam, hahaha. Back to the issue, how about Muslim Chinese community? Chinese Muslim community are like in no existence in Malaysia although they exist.

I have experience with both Muslim Chinese and Muslim Indians in Malaysia. Muslim Indians don't really have problem with their religious and community activities. But Muslim Chinese in Malaysia do encounter problems. I read some Muslim Chinese blogs and they provides informations about reading materials.

My sister had a Muslim Chinese friend too during our good old days in Cheras. We live in the Sri Sabah flat, the residence of the paupers in Cheras of KL side. Its MCA parliament member was Dato' Seri Chen Zhaihe, I guess. The Muslim Chinese family with the surname Lee whom son was my sister's classmate ran a tea shop in the Cheras Municipal Market. We  always had our breakfast and buying drinks there. I don't know whether the shop is still operating or not.

At that time I did not really care about people's religion so I don't know that they are Muslims just like us and also are Cantonese. At that time when I was a kid until my youth time, I wasn't really sure about what is my religion, I was leaning toward Buddhism principles without any dependence to God. People use to say about indoctrination process when we were kids, but I guess it doesn't work to me when I was a kid. I found my own path in 2003/2004 when I could think myself and of course with the guidance of Lord God. 

I guess I will have to go to Malaysian Muslim Chinese Association or the Islamic Development Department applying the materials for myself too.Maybe I could get some serious materials rather than basic ones because I had read those basic materials given to me by the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia during my pilgrimage with my mom to Holy Land in the end of 2004. They gave us Indonesian stuffs. We don't speak Indonesian but  we speak Northern Malay or Southern Thai dialect interchangeably. I had asked them to give me English version because I can't really understand Indonesian and they don't have Chinese materials with them during our departure to Medina el-Monawwara because they don't expect Chinese speakers to be in majority Malay speakers Malaysian jama'a. 

I will save the story when I talk with Muslim brothers and sisters from Gansu and Xinjiang during Hajj season in Holy Land. At that time my fluency in Chinese is not affected like now because now I had mixed with Malay majority speaking people. Until at some point I have to avoid speaking in Chinese in the public as to avoid being  a subject of ridicule by Malay fellows in my hostel during my bachelor degree time. People around  in the Holy Land like those from India and Pakistan feel weird seeing that I wear Malaysian wrist band on my hand while others are from China and we talked in Chinese.  

May Allah forgive us our sins either it is intentional or unintentional. Bless us O Lord of Universe grant us Your love, amin!

O Friend!

A very beautiful nasheed with good lyrics. I love this nasheed besides the voice is nice. Although my Arabic becomes worse and worse day by day and being a friend to a Palestinian classmate does not  really helping me in polishing my rusty Arabic because he is quite a boast. He thinks that speaking in English makes people understand him better, but I still can't understand his Palestinian Arabic accented English. 

Most Arabs from Mid East speak terrible English with horrible pronunciation. I'm sorry for this, but this is the fact although my Palestinian colleague always condemning Chinese or Malay accent of some Malaysian students who speak in English.  

Allah! I miss my teacher Ustaz Mustaffa from Cambodia during my jobless time where almost every night I went to the mosque seeking refuge and peace from uncertain future after bachelor graduation. He's a good Arabic teacher and I respect his vast and firm knowledge in Nahw Sarf (Arabic grammar). I miss Ustaz Ahmad Wan from UITM too. His method  of teaching is quite good for beginner although I had already have the basic knowledge of Arabic. 

I still think that it is good to figure out the easiest approach to teach beginners Arabic because I hate English. I only want to hear Arabic like when I made my pilgrimage to Mecca. Thanks to both of them, I will pray for bountiful of blessings for them and their family : )

I can't find the lyrics although I had tried asking mr. Google with Arabic keyboard. Might be a new released nasheed.  The singer of tis nasheed is Muhammad Khaled and he's from Yemen. I hope someday I could speak in Yemeni (Teheimani) Arabic, our ancestral language : )

Anyway, my understanding is that, the first part of this lovely nasheed talks about a friend who reminds his friend to testify that indeed God is only One, His blessings is everywhere and testify the descent of Hashem clan, Ahmad who called to the guidance of God. 

And the second part, he reminds his friend to perform the prayers. Make out some of the belongings for property purification may you be accepted by God, fast! As it is better for everyone, and perform pilgrimage to the House of God.

Purify the soul, speak with noble speeches. And be known to you, read the book of God. Raise up! Help those who are tyrannized, clear up the effects of damages, be firm to the promise, may God be please with you. Be good to your neighbors, respecting your guests, be sincere to, and forgiveness to those who asking for God forgiveness. Guide classes and law to the householders be cautious to the danger caused by eyes. Be angry with the order of God.

No emerging debt, no deserted those who are loved. Thus we recited what had been written, in the revelation from the side of God. Continous mercy, and no insulted days! Be a friend that salvate, may you be pleased with hasty aid from God.    

The end part I can't really substitute the words into other languages but I am so astonished with them. I heard like it said about the priority on sanctifying God's name, do not leave the obedience duties, and the longing soul. Later it says, the balance is the reward of seeing Lord God glorious appearance in the hereafter.

Isn't it good to have friends that reminds us to be on the straight path and  helping us in remaining in the law of God? I love to see those tabligh guys getting together in the musalla at my current hostel and they remind each other with words from scriptures and sunna. I hope they will always remain like that elal-abaad. May Allah bless everyone, forgiving our sins. Bountiful of blessings to our beloved and dear prophet, may God bless him his family, companions, disciples, and followers.

Importance of Tajweed

Peace!

Last two nights I had followed my mother to her Quran classes at the mosque in our vicinity. Very interesting although before I had giving her reasons not to follow her. The fact is that I am shy to enter to the classes although the teachers there are quite friendly and helpful. The first class that I had joined in this only one week holiday is Tarannum class but I did not try reciting the verses in melodious way because I am not accustomed to it.

The second night I went again to the mosque for Tajweed class. We recited surah aal-'Emran verses 1-22. Ouch, I could detect my mistakes in recitations too not only the Ustaz especially the part of Waagebul Ghunna (Obligatory Nasalization). This is so terrible, I might be making many mistakes in recitations without realizing it and accumulating sins. 

I still remember, when I was a lil kid and forced to study in religious evening schools I did not realize how important Tajweed is. I always fail the tests and couldn't barely remember the names of the rules for recitation. Now I am trying to memorize Quran after my repentance in Holy Mecca, I realized that I need Tajweed. God Will, I will learn from the scratch again.    

Beginning

Peace,

Many things had happened these weekends along. I have a very hectic 6 months and trying to get someone to talk with about my problems but I found that some secrets rather not good to be shared with others or will expose me to danger.  I will assume that I am talking to God in this little space. I don't know how long this blog will end but I will write anything that I feel in here.

As to describe myself, I am not really a talkative person. Even I will have trouble in explaining directions to people when being asked since I don't really talk. I observe more than talking. When I meet people who talks a lot, I will try to keep my self in distance. Not because I am trying to play holy, but I just want to avoid sins as I am already a sinner. 

This is among the reasons I don't really have close friends. I am a slave of God seeking for repentance and trying to perform penitence. I hope that God will be Merciful to me, to my parents, to my grandparents, and to my beloved friends by forgiving our sins through the blessings of Islam. 

Now I am not really in the mood to revise books for exams. Sometimes we need motivations and I tried to find it myself. But I am still out of mood. I keep asking myself on this step that I had taken. Whether it is correct or not when I am pursuing studies in a totally different field that I had taken during my degree. I had rebelled God when I left religious studies. I want to return back but it seems that my path is now facing obstacles. These are all my faults due to my own ignorance.

God forgive me my sins. Grant me please with Your blessings and give me strength to go through this world. I feel myself as a worthless slave, I had brought my parents into diffilculties. Guide me dear God, be Merciful to me Your lowly servant!!!